MadhouseLive

Big Belly Bella – 10/11/2018 Show

11 Oct 2018 · 2 h 59 min · 12,723 words · source

Calls (32, 1 h 19 min of 2 h 59 min)

  1. Call forwarded to voicemail ivr 48 s clip ↓
  2. Pensacola resident calls for help with weed delivery live 2.3 min clip ↓
  3. Caller demands not to be transferred to police live 1.3 min clip ↓
  4. Caller accuses transfer of entrapment live 33 s clip ↓
  5. Caller mistaken for Brad Carter live 33 s clip ↓
  6. Call Nation Madhouse Live customer dispute live 9.8 min clip ↓
  7. UPS delivery dispute with manager live 2.1 min clip ↓
  8. Delivery guy refused package delivery live 5.6 min clip ↓
  9. Cop cam user complains about short recordings live 6.6 min clip ↓
  10. Hooters worker hassled by caller live 1.6 min clip ↓
  11. Sharmouta Animal Horrible Asker Aunt live 2.1 min clip ↓
  12. Bell Paddy cop cam SD card issue live 2.1 min clip ↓
  13. Caller Closo reconnects with Carlito live 2.3 min clip ↓
  14. Order for papadums at restaurant live 1.3 min clip ↓
  15. Chinese Embassy Australia voicemail ivr 5.6 min clip ↓
  16. Luxor Show Reservations automated menu ivr 3.8 min clip ↓
  17. Valley High Golf Club asked about bachelor party live 2.6 min clip ↓
  18. Zoo asked about lizards and bearded dragons live 2.3 min clip ↓
  19. Call Nation Madhouse Live prank call live 1.1 min clip ↓
  20. Call Nation Madhouse Live final call live 3.3 min clip ↓
  21. Planet Fitness customer survey prank live 4.1 min clip ↓
  22. Planet Fitness black card survey live 3.1 min clip ↓
  23. Planet Fitness corporate survey prank live 33 s clip ↓
  24. Planet Fitness millionth customer hoax live 3.1 min clip ↓
  25. Call Nation Madhouse Live getting soundbite live 1.1 min clip ↓
  26. Roosters restaurant asked about order live 48 s clip ↓
  27. Calling Roosters for Big Fat Bella karaoke live 3.3 min clip ↓
  28. Calling Joey Guns bouncer live 2.1 min clip ↓
  29. Calling Beer Authority manager live 1.1 min clip ↓
  30. Calling Joey Guns again live 1.6 min clip ↓
  31. Rule 3 representative asked about Kana live 1.3 min clip ↓
  32. Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live menu ivr 33 s clip ↓

Transcript

Shut up. Shut up. I am the customer. You will listen to me. Oh, you're mr. Entitled fucking customer
No, I'm not. Oh my god
So you're 22 years old and the best thing you have to do with your time is call
Hooters and hassle a worker like me who is actually very busy right now and trying to do my job and just pay for my
Rent and I have to deal with people
I'm in the streets listening to Madhouse Live
I hope my speech can compete with that bad mouth style
That we get from Carlito
That's my big amigo
So just kick back to listen to this cat call
People when this show goes live
I be like damn this shit's bitchin'
Stop whatever I'm doing to tune in and listen
You can catch me in the back of his home
At Horse Machine Ranch Road
I'm busting mad fat flows for assholes and banchos
Must be crazy
Shout out to Big Amy
That's nice honey baby
Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Ladies and gentlemen, this is...
Your call has been forwarded to an automated voice messaging system.
Shit!
The cold open don't go, the cold open don't go.
Gotta make the cold open machine go.
That was an FU button I got there.
Your call.
Yep.
Hey everybody, it's Madhouse Radio!
Yeah! Get hype!
Best part of the show, when the phone rings.
You guys just heard it.
MadHouseLive.com
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Yeah, what other options come that you can get?
Yeah, onion, cheese, ham, tomato, mushroom, jalapeno, peppers, chili, and gravy.
But you got like all those name things, right?
Covered, smothered.
What are they called?
You got covered, smothered, you know what I'm saying?
Smothered is onions, covered is cheese, diced is tomato, chunked is ham, diced is tomato,
capped is mushroom, topped is chili, country is gravy.
Country is gravy.
Okay, all right.
Closed Captioning by The Closed Captioning Project.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
What's going on?
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I was trying to make an order, but she doesn't understand.
What you was trying to get.
All right, you ready to take it?
I'm not going to take it.
I just want to know what it is.
What do you do there?
You're the cook?
I cook.
You cook?
Yeah.
Yeah, hey, don't give me that African-American attitude either, all right?
Hey, I'm going to hang up, dude.
Hey, listen, I'm coming at you with love, all right?
Whatever, man.
Anyway, how about that Kanye West today in the White House, huh?
That fucking dumb motherfucker.
Fucking stupid.
doesn't understand that fucking Trump is using his stupid ass
he's stupid shit
how awkward was that
he's cursing in the oval office in the White House
he said motherfucker this
and fucking shit that
and he didn't say the n-word
about time
yeah hey how you doing my man
not good not good
I'm in Pensacola
got it okay Pensacola
yeah and we got hit pretty hard
you know
yeah Pensacola got hit pretty hard
gotcha yes sir
Call Nation Madhouse Live
So I'm not aware of where you're...
I'm in Pensacola, Pensacola Terrace.
No, no, no, right, I understand that, but right, so my question to you is, there's a certain gentleman you'd like us to check on?
Well, his name's Lysol, yeah, so I gave him like 50 bucks and he was supposed to bring weed and he said he had to take his mom somewhere to evacuate to Alabama or something because she's on dialysis.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
We just need to get, you know, like, we're down to, like, left here, and the air conditioning isn't working, and it's gonna get, like, really shitty around here pretty soon if we're not high, you know?
Um, okay, sir, um, so that, um, sir, hold on one second.
Okay.
I guess I'm in trouble with YouTube.
Everyone donate to Hurricane Michael Relief via the Red Cross.
Head over to madhouselive.com slash donate.
I will totally forward that on.
As a former Floridian, I appreciate that.
Sir, this is, so I would encourage you to contact local law enforcement for that issue.
Why? Why would I? Like, have you seen the cops in this town?
Sir, this is the official state of Florida emergency response line dealing with the response to Hurricane Michael.
This is the media relations line.
Right, but this is dealing with that. Right, so this has gone to, as a citizen, I'm citizens, you know, citizens inquiries as well.
Right, well, I'm here.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Hey, sir, I'm going to transfer you to a fellow.
Don't you be transferring me to police while I command you to tell me right now if that's what you're going to do or it's entrapment.
Sir, no, this is a person that also works in my same unit right here.
We'll see.
All right.
Hello.
Oh, my dog farted.
Hey.
Hi.
Yeah.
Are you a cop?
You have to tell me if you are.
So, sir, I feel like that you're probably trying to play a prank.
No, no, no, no, no.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
entire
all
the
world
でも
yeah
me
me
ya
ya
like
but
ya
ya
ya
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ya
ya
ya
ya
Madhouse Live
Don't play the things in the background.
Hello?
I turned my radio down.
Can you hear me?
Hey, Brad Carter.
Yeah.
Woo.
Yeah.
How you doing?
Good.
How you doing?
Pretty good.
Good.
So, hey, I'm sorry I ran into your show.
Yeah?
Yeah.
My show ran into your show a little bit because I had just this insane call happening.
Okay.
That's okay.
And I just sent it to you as a number you need to call if you don't mind.
Okay.
So tell me, I was listening to the UPS stuff as I was getting ready.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Hello this is Chris
Hi Chris my name is Cross
I am the supervisor here for the
Negation region regarding
Package issue that you're having I understand
Yes thank you for calling me back
Okay what can I do you for sir
So um
First of all the driver
Roy
He used my package as a
Booster and so he completely
Destroyed my package
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Well, not my proudest moment, but yes, I was vulgar as well. He had started it. In the process of trying to argue with him about where it needed to go, I asked him to just have his boss drop it off or some other driver, just somebody to get it to my house at some point. He said no and got very angry with me, proceeded to call me a racist when I haven't ever seen the man. And after about 15 minutes of him yelling at me and arguing with me and saying very vulgar things, he finally gave me over to him.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
right now. So the first thing first, you have a massive personnel problem. Second thing.
There's still a package that needs to get to my house is broken. And we'll get here.
I'll have to say yes, it's broken, do whatever the insurance thing you guys have for packages
that get broken and have another one cent. And that I'm not too terribly worried about.
It's a couple pieces of plastic for some gas cans. So the package not the end of the world
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
tikka masala papadum Carlito Laugh Track Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Closed Captioning by The Closed Captioning Project.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
The only way for you to take care of this is to get the box to my house and fire those two employees.
Here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to get that box back to you tonight.
It's going to be Roy that brings it. He's going to throw the package out.
Do you have a driveway?
That's not acceptable. It needs to be hand-delivered.
No, we don't hand-deliver anything, sir.
Yes, you do.
No, we don't.
You're required to put it on the doorstep.
If you do not put it on the doorstep, you have not legally fulfilled your requirement.
Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
We can open this and search it now!
What do you have to hide?
Go ahead.
Open it and search it.
I don't care.
Find a piece of plastic and have fun.
Oh, really?
You sure about that?
You know what?
Let me call down right now.
Roy, you there?
This is Roy.
Good to have you.
Hey, I'm with that asshole.
I have him on hold right now.
He says he's...
Good job!
I'm not on hold.
You need to wait for them.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I did not make a single racist comment.
Telling them to do their job is not racist.
Roy, what happened? You tell me. Tell me everything, Roy.
The way he was yelling was very racist.
The way I was yelling? Tell me the specific racist word that I used.
Because yelling at you for not doing your job is not racist.
I didn't say you used a racist word.
I can't be racist if I don't know what race you are.
Please feel free to tell me what race you are.
Oh, no, you don't need to focus on race like you always do.
I'm sorry, you won't even tell me your race. I can't be racist if I don't know your race. Duh. Key thing of being racist is I have to know your race. Can't be racist if I don't know it. You just said I don't know it, therefore I cannot be racist. You destroyed your own argument.
You see how he said duh like that to you? That's very racist.
Putting this into the computer right now.
Sir, maybe you're ignorant, maybe you're ignorant, asshole, but the word duh has been used as a racial term against Japanese Americans for about 42 years.
Yes, it has.
Yes, it has.
Oh, you're the expert.
You're the fucking legal expert here.
And dumbass.
Got at that, too.
Sir, I want to let you...
It doesn't matter.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
The thing that I'm going to get you fired because you failed to do your job is racist. No, it's not.
Chris Adams called me spick, S-P-I-C. Is that how you spell the word?
I did not say spick in no way, shape, or form, did I?
I heard him. I heard him. He said that. I heard him. He said it.
I did not say it. Stop lying.
Threatened to have all you reekins fired. Okay.
What random ass word are you putting in my mouth now?
Because I said none of this.
I said you will be fired for failure to do your job.
I'm not getting fired.
I'm in management.
I'm a union person, and I'm not going anywhere, sir.
Just to let you know, I'm not going anywhere.
I'm staying right here.
Oh, great.
So give me to your boss now.
You want to just pull bosses out of my ass?
I'm the boss.
I am the boss right here.
Unless you know how to get a hold of the...
You do not own UPS.
You are not the boss.
Unless you know how to get a hold of UPS, you know, CEO, and you might be able to help me out with that, because I haven't been able to. I got some things I need to run by on.
I'm not getting fired, sir. Just to let you know, nothing's going to happen to me. You're just a drop-in-a-bucket asshole customer.
I just, I just...
The way you're talking, you're going to tell me you're not an asshole from the beginning of this call. You're having to sound like a douchebag asshole.
Oh, okay, sure.
That is actually sexist.
You're a pet rock.
You're a balding.
You're a Vietnam vet.
Use all that against me.
Nothing, no one fucking cares, okay?
Actually, no, I'm not a Vietnam vet, but I would be damn proud to be one.
Well, you sound like a crazy fucking, you sound like a crazy fucking Vietnam vet,
and I want to give you a job based on your veteran status.
You do realize how ridiculous all three of you sound right now.
Oh, yeah, you sound perfect.
You sound just even, Steven.
You're right.
I do, because I am in the right, and you need to deliver the package like you're legally contracted to do.
You're legally required to put it on the doorstep.
No, he is not.
What law, jerk-off?
What law imposed on a private entity, UPS?
This isn't USPS, dumbass.
We're not a federal entity.
Do you understand that?
Guess what?
Stupid.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Well, yeah, you guys make the best lawyers, and you're Mr. Lawyer of the Year, so apparently you must be, you know, Jew.
Oh my God, now you're actually being racist, because I'm not Jewish, by the way.
I just complimented you.
He is actually racist.
I just complimented you.
I think I just lost his package by accident. I'm sorry.
What, you got some gas cans and shit? Like, what's the big fucking deal?
Listen, let's just get this to you and call it even, alright? And we can both be happy.
Yep, go ahead and drop it off at my doorstep.
I need you to accept that. I need you to say that on the phone verbally that you accept.
Excuse me.
No.
According to what? But according to what?
Legally not allowed to...
According to the According to the sign that you would read Shut up We do it all the time, don't worry about it Then you break the law all the time because you cannot leave a package unattended not when it's supposed to be dropped The package is not then delivered until it is on the premises in ten feet of my doorstep Nobody cares about your fucking gas cans fucking not being being left under a fucking stop sign You're the only one being a douchebag Asshole
I really don't care what you call me because, you see, I'm not offended by, you know, random words.
You sure sound offended and upset.
What upsets you so much, buddy?
Oh, you see, what I'm actually upset about is the fact that you're failing to do your job.
We're trying to deliver it.
You're refusing delivery.
I am not refusing delivery.
I am requiring proper delivery.
There is a difference.
You know what, Roy?
I'm requiring delivery to my house.
Rory feels very threatened by the way you're acting about this package.
This is very silly of you.
Hey, buddy.
The only thing I have tried to do is get my package delivered like you're legally required to deliver it.
Sounds like the kind of guy that drives a motorcycle.
It's a pretty small package, too, you know?
Yeah, just like your package.
I really don't need to know about your guys' packages. I just need you to deliver my package like you're legally required.
You're not getting it, sir. You've refused delivery already.
I did not refuse delivery. I required you to deliver it to the correct spot.
Dropping it off the curb four blocks away is not a delivery.
Like a normal person and just picked it up at the stop sign. Why are you putting so much energy into this?
The stop sign is not a normal place to drop it off.
It can be dropped off anywhere we need to, sir.
It's not a legal, allowable place to drop a package.
No one's going to steal it. Stop.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Closed Captions by the Amara.org community
How about fuck you? Call your mom. Call your mama about it.
Alright, finally he's done. That guy.
Jeez.
Oh, he should.
He's a serious fucking guy.
I mean, he's...
That's why my show ran into your show.
I'd hang up.
He's a lot of fun, that guy.
Yep.
Call him back, here.
What?
You know how he didn't have a driveway?
He might be living in a condo or something.
That's what I asked.
I looked up his house on Google Maps, and he has a driveway.
There's a motorcycle sitting in it.
There's a giant American flag.
It doesn't sound like that kind of guy to have a big motorcycle and a flag.
Yeah.
I'm trying them again.
Deliver my package by 5 o'clock tomorrow.
Turn my doorstep or you will be-
I have an update.
I have an update.
That's all he wants to say.
He doesn't want to say anything else.
Deliver my package.
Wow.
Well, that was fun, Brad.
Thanks for sharing that.
Yeah, thanks for calling.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Yes, I don't like lawyers really that much and sales people because they act like they all act like that man
Just I changed my caller ID to the toll-free line. Oh, it's been forwarded to an automatic voice message
Sorry
Yeah, yeah you were you were I was trying to do something else
Let me try one more time trying to get like an automated automated thing this fucking microphone man keeps
Call Nation Madhouse Live
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Prank Call Nation
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I think option in the first one is 30.
Dude, that Hurricane Spin Scrubber looks cool as fuck.
I'm going to get that thing.
Thanks for calling, Belpit.
You are speaking with Justin.
Are you calling for a retail purchase,
or did you place the order over the phone or on the website?
I placed the damn order already.
I'm sorry?
I placed the order, damn it.
The order, I already placed it.
All right.
Okay.
All right, just give me a moment.
When did you place the order?
I already have it here. You don't even know what I got.
So how may I help you today?
I got the cop cam.
All right. And I put it in the toilet so I could take video of the girls peeing in the train station.
And whenever I put it in there, it like turns itself off after a certain amount of time.
Yes, because you are using it in a bad way.
Please use it in a good way. Then it will work properly for you.
Well, what's the good way? I don't understand. You need to help me. This isn't fair.
All right. First of all.
Stupid.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Come on. Oh, man. He's gone. He's gone. I was going to play piss in sound effects. It was going to make great fucking sense. Oh, he's still connected. All right. Let's call back. Let's call again. Let's call again. It just takes so long to get through.
Thank you for calling to order cop cam.
Fucking Kanye West hitting the fucking, the president's desk.
How disrespectful getting his greasy fucking black hands all over.
That's Kennedy's desk, you asshole.
You ignorant.
You stupid.
Or do you even touch that desk?
Thank you for calling.
This is Nathan.
Are you calling for a retail purchase?
Your name's not Nathan.
What was your name?
Nathan?
Yes, my name is Nathan.
Your parents named you Nathan?
Yes.
Right.
Okay.
I'm sorry for the inconvenience, sir. Be professional. Because here, you there?
Yeah, I'm here. Hello. Hello. Yeah, I'm here. Go, monkey. I'm here.
I'm so sorry, sir. Please be professional, okay?
I'm just telling you what I'm using it for. I put it in the toilet, you know, for medical purposes.
But look, I'll play it again. Listen.
And it stops right there. I mean, that's like five seconds. You understand?
Yes. What is the problem that you're facing with the product?
Well, it's supposed to keep recording until I turn it off. It only records five seconds at a time.
Every time I start, like, here's another one right here.
This woman's...
She's peeing.
And it shuts off right there.
I can't masturbate to this. This is like five seconds.
I'm so sorry, sir. Please be professional on the call, okay?
I'm not masturbating now. I'm just saying.
I'm so sorry, sir. This product will work only when there is a motion.
If there is no motion, then it will not work.
Yeah, but I can see the urine is coming out of her vagina. Look.
There's motion. Clearly there's motion.
Look, I can see it coming out.
And she passes gas and then it stops.
I'm so sorry, sir. Please be professional. Otherwise, I will have to disconnect this call.
I'm being perfect. What do you want me to say that she has flatulence? She urinates. I'm not saying anything vulgar. She's urinating. See, she's urinating. I can see her pubic hair and her vagina. And then she she like farts a little bit and then it turns off. I would request you to kindly use professional language. Otherwise, I will have to disconnect this call. Okay, so what do you already told you? How do I make this? How do I make it go in the toilet? Here, let me tell you, it's a small camera. You can use it anywhere. However, you said that it's no recording.
one man
but there's motion there's did you can see the liquid coming out
and the video like I i see her sit down and she her pants are often see her
her butt cheeks and her vagina and in
she starts pushing out the urine
this is coming out of her have you no her private parks
I'm really sorry sir.
Benchod
Let me check this information.
May I put this call on hold for a brief while?
Hurry up.
Thank you.
All right.
Please use, please use the professional language.
Big Jose saying, what's up, Jose?
Looks like you gained some weight there, man.
You got to lay off the monster drinks.
Got a number from Big Brendan.
All right, Brendan, we'll give that number a call.
This is Chicago.
Did I call there last week?
I think.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
I've been warning you since from the beginning.
Okay, no, no, please, I'll stop, I'll stop.
But can you just help me?
I need to make this work in the Twillaw.
They are Indian, guys.
They are Indian.
He knows what the bhenchod is.
He knows what the bhenchod is.
Yeah!
Yeah!
Bhenchod.
Bhenchod.
He knows what that is.
All right, here comes the next call.
Why no one call me?
Why no one like me anymore?
405-396-6884.
405-396-6884
Callers of Campbell
Hey honey, how are you?
It's me
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
How old are you?
22
So you're 22 years old
and the best thing you have to do with your time
is call Hooters and hassle a worker like me
who is actually very busy right now
and trying to do my job and just pay for my rent
and I have to deal with people like you
that call me
I'll put you on hold for my manager
Are you working your way through college you stripper?
Go ahead
What's up?
Go ahead working your way through college stripper. Go ahead. You're so funny. What do you do for a living? I do prank calls
Yeah, clearly. Well, don't quit your day job because you're not very good at it
I just got a $10 donation from Walter Heinemichel over. So what's good? What's up? Oh, what's up? What's up?
And stop wasting your time
Hey, I got a racist
Really lonely if this is all you can do in your free time, let me put racist man on the phone shit
Uncommon
No, no, no.
You would be an anti-Semitic.
That lawyer, that Jew would be
an anti-Semitic.
That's not a race.
That's a religion. It is a race, too.
I don't know. Whatever.
You sound like a legend. Are you a legend?
You're probably going to say you're a legend.
No. I'm not like you today.
Good. I hate that guy.
He's an asshole.
Yeah.
Sharmouta
Sharmouta Animal
Horrible
Asker Aunt
Asker Uncle
Asker Grandmama
Church
Fuck Me
Yeah
How you doing?
Good thank you
How about you?
I want to make an order
Sure
What would you like to have?
One meat
Okay
One of those?
Do you want me to take your order?
Yes, please.
Okay, what would you like to have?
Okay, one.
Stupid.
That's fucking stupid.
What a waste of a fucking call.
She sounded kind of annoyed the whole time.
From the beginning, she was annoyed that one.
What race do you think she was, sir?
The human.
Sounded like human to me.
Okay, good.
Yeah, I got one.
Shut up.
Thank you for calling Boston.
The founders.
Holy shit.
We're back.
When I dial a number, I have to hold you for a few seconds there.
Oh, I see.
Good on Baskin-Bakker's Roshanna.
Hi, Roshanna. I'd like to make an order.
Okay. Give me one second.
I'm taking a shit.
I guess she was listening that whole time.
Wow. Great.
Carl, are you sure you're not legend? You really sound like legend.
Can't you just say you're a legend?
I'm not him. He's an asshole.
I'm somebody else today.
A completely different person.
No, you're a legend. I understand.
No.
Okay.
We need to get closer to Gondou's back.
Gondou?
Well, you have Gondou numbers, motherfucker?
Well, that's the problem.
They're Texas sports, and they're only, like, open to nine to five Eastern
because they know that's when they make money for the old people who don't know shit about computers.
Did you see the big arrest that happened?
Well, there was, like, a big crackdown in India on the scammers.
I wonder if I don't know if they picked your boys up or not no I know there's so many of them I mean
I'll get you a cop cam
you just gotta sit through it you know it's all good
I had Burger King and this is the second time I had Burger King and I feel like I gotta you know
shit my brains out
Thanks for calling Bell Paddy, you are speaking with Justin.
Are you calling for a retail purchase or did you place the order over the phone or on the website?
Well, you see, I got one of these cop cameras and stuff like that.
All right.
I don't have health insurance or anything.
I was trying to see if I had any polyps or anything, so I kind of doused it with KY lubricant and I shoved it in my ass
I'm trying to look and see if I have any pallets or anything like that.
And when I pull it back out, I couldn't get the SD card to read on my computer.
I apologize, but there is lots of static in the call.
Oh, no.
Can you hear me now?
I really apologize. There are lots of sounds like...
Oh, I don't understand what's going on. I'm speaking directly into my phone.
Anyway, sir, did you hear my complaint?
I was calling concerning my cop cam. I can't get the SD card to read. I can't read the SD card.
Did you get the SD card?
I'm sorry, sir. What? I'm sorry?
I really apologize, sir, but I'm trying my best, but I can barely hear you.
Okay, I'm speaking as loud as I possibly can right now. Can you hear me or not?
I can hear you now, but the words which you're telling me.
Okay, let me drop the southern accent. Perhaps you can hear me now. Can you understand me now?
Yes, now. Go ahead, please.
Okay, I'm having a concern with my cop cam. I can't read anything from the SD card, sir.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I can I can hear you first of all yes first of all I really apologize I cannot hear a word you told me all right you went too fast and moreover your voice is breaking in and out so it is you're fucking stupid you know that you hear that I think you know how fucking stupid you are sir first of all yes your voice is audible now you can tell me the queries okay can you hear me
Why can't you hear my associate? I don't understand. Why are you so stupid?
Please be polite with me so that I can help you and I'm being very polite with you right now
Hey, fuck monkey. All right. I'm a little monkey and about son of owls
Okay, he's got a complaint. I mean, I don't know what else to do here man
What do we do? Where do we go from here? If you don't want to listen if you're refusing to listen
Call Nation Madhouse Live
The
Second Thing Is That Did You Put The
Micro SD Card Inside The Cop Camp Yes I Did All Right Stupid Now Just Allow Me
About The One It Has The Most On It It Has The Motion On It All Right And Ever
Someone Or Goes Inside In Front Of The Camera Then It Would Work Okay But That's
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Cable TV
Call Nation
No he can't help you listen you know how we got it your mother came over and she opened her legs and it came out of her vagina that's what happened
Do you understand that?
Son of 99 cop cabs.
I'm in the near future.
I don't know if I'll see this, but I'm pretty sure you will.
That's going to be a thing.
You can actually go, you know, buy this little thing, swallow it,
and you can watch the travel at home.
I'm not talking at the doctor's office.
That's coming soon to reality near you.
And that cop cab can go to hell after that because then we'll fucking have shit.
They don't have customer service first.
They have to go through a big tree of hell.
Where am I anyway?
I don't even know.
I'll swallow on every day just to see how I'm doing down there.
Hey, we're going to go, Indian man, because you're an asshole, all right?
And the cop cam is his shit.
Has the show started?
Yeah, we've been here, but this fucking guy.
God damn.
What's wrong with the phone?
You can't hear me?
I don't know.
He can hear you fine.
You're on the same line.
You're literally, your conference on the telephone with him.
There's nothing getting in the way.
Yeah, I'll try another one.
Available today for two easy payments of just $19.99 each, plus $9.99 shipping and handling.
Chicken tikka masala ala kaat or full dinner?
Yeah, okay. Do you have chicken 65?
No, I don't.
God damn. Okay, I need a couple of papadum.
Chicken tikka masala ala kaat only. The dish, full dinner comes with naan, rice, lentil soup and jabut.
Oh yeah, okay, you got naan, rice, you got everything, okay.
Does he have pokadum, papadums? I'm sorry. God damn.
Chicken tikka masala full dinner?
Why are you saying like you're far away?
What's going on?
We are far away.
Yes, can you hear me?
Yeah, go ahead, go ahead.
I think it's my phone.
It might be.
It might be.
It might be my racist phone.
Hello?
Yeah.
God damn it.
I'm going to return to base.
Why shit's not working?
All right, return to base.
RTB.
All right, I'll take care of it.
All right.
Bye.
RTLS.
RTLS.
Bye, buddy.
All right, that's legend.
It's sponsored shit.
Hey, sir, I need to make an order.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
He wants to kiss an Indian girl on her private parts. Do you have a sister, sir?
Do you have a sister? No?
Does he have a sister? I need to kiss his sister.
Hey, caller, how you doing? Sorry to throw you in there.
Hey, Carlito. It's Closo. I don't know if you remember me.
Closo.
Years ago. Closo. I used to be in the chat, you know?
So, Closo, Closo.
It's been a while. You know, you shouted me out a couple times, Closo, Closo, but it was Closo.
You know, K-L-O-S-O, we were a rock.
We used to be PS3 PlayStation buddies back in the day.
I think I remember you from PS3. Yeah, you know, man. I yeah, yeah
I and I just want to say cuz I just got off work and I've always been I've been able to catch live shows
And I'm just like hey, I call my man, you know
It's amazing to hear you bro, and I'm trying to get a quick shot at the can you know a boy the milkman
You know the boys can yeah, but um, it's it's amazing. I've called it fucking 20 times. Damn late reception reception
It's hard to get through, man, but you can always see my voicemail, you know.
Yeah, I mean, yeah, exactly, yeah, but right now I'm just buying a beer when I was a tall boy and listening to the show, so.
Nice.
That's why I was having a happy, I was like, wait, is that Carlito on the fucking phone?
That's me.
I actually got it, holy shit.
Yeah.
So, yeah, I mean, I'll be leaving in about a month, there's the army, so I'm like.
Holy shit.
Anytime I listen, yeah, bro, so.
Fuck.
I'm 22 now, so, I mean, I've been listening for, since I was a little kid, bro, I'm an oldie.
Fucking army, holy shit, what are your plans for the army, what do you want to be, an army ranger?
I want to be a banshoed kisser, but no, I want to be in the medical field, of course, you know, of course, of course, yes, of course, yeah, so, I mean, I got, so, I mean, I got one of those, I look easy right here at the register, because, I mean, there's no one I saw you currently on me, make sure they get your brown bag, brown bag, I mean, I don't need a brown bag, I can, if you can, yeah, sorry, sorry about that, no, so, I'm just saying that you will be getting a beer, whatever is calling in, hey, if I can get in the call, you know, I've been always wanting to, so, yeah, absolutely, hey, listen, be careful,
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I just download the archives on the network. I just listen to it. Yeah, cool. Take some
Yeah, take some
Listen and tell those army boys because this is that thing we could do
Yeah, yeah
Dropping the soap there
You're gonna have to shit in front of other people now
I've already had the fun
Nan and Curry?
Yes, sir
I'd like to make an order
Sure, sir
Okay, like one order of papadums?
We don't have papadums, sir
Do you have chicken 65?
No, we don't have them
Do you have chicken 65?
Did you order at the right place? I'm calling from Saratoga
You're calling from Saratoga Avenue, yeah, San Jose
Nan and Curry, 375, Nan and Curry
Yes, sir, yes, sir
Okay, well, don't be banchot, alright?
Chicken Tikka Masala
Stuffed Naan
Paneer Naan
Paneer Naan, that's the cheese, right?
Onion Naan, we don't put cheese in onion, we put onions in it.
If you want cheese one, that's called Chili Cheese Naan.
That's called Chili Panaan?
Chili Cheese.
Chili Cheese.
Yeah, Chili Cheese Naan.
Makes perfect sense.
Okay, I'll take one of those.
Okay.
One bhenchod.
One, sorry, sir?
Bhenchod.
Hey, can I make an order?
Can you give me something else, Carlito?
Yeah, sure.
Hey, I'm going to put my friend, he's about to join the army.
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Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
It looks like it's gonna be safe Francisco. Yeah, and I'm gonna try to become, you know machine member horse member
Whatever cuz you know, I want to be I got a discord. I want to be at least part of that
Oh this court, you know, it's not it's got quiet right now, but I'm gonna make my best
No, cuz uh this you're my man, bro
You've got me through ups and downs in my life
Like if you can believe it or not your prank calls have taken me out of depression your prank off that made me a smile
So you've you've changed people. I'm telling you right now, you know, you ain't just some funny. Haha guy, you know, you actually
Laugh Track Matt Baz Milkman
I was trying to call the Chinese Embassy in Australia.
Let's see what happened.
I can't get to the phone right now.
Leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I'm available.
That's Australian to me.
Sounds like I had the right number.
Or at least I had the right intention.
Let's see here.
Chinese Visa Application Service Center.
That's not it.
It? Man, because is it Saturday already over there in that fuck? No, no. I'll try to call
anywhere. Hang on. I think they're always staffed. They don't just leave the embassy
closed.
What?
Don't answer any phone calls.
Correct the code 2050.
Give out an address.
Contact phone 02-8595-8002.
R
Password 02-8595-8021.
Ching Chong Ching Chow Ching Chong.
Totally not being racist here, folks.
So looking at doing incoming calls for the next international telephone call business,
international business telephone call machines show.
Ended by remote, which means they keep hanging up on me.
Fucking fuck.
All right, we'll call a consulate instead.
This is in New Zealand, home of the Kiwis.
Hello, thank you for calling the Consulate General of the People's Republic of China in Auckland.
For Chinese language service, please dial 1.
For English language service, please dial 2.
The person at extension 1-8-1-3 is unavailable.
Please leave...
Oh, fuck it. This has to be during the day. I got callers coming in, but real quick, I want to just let everyone know we had some super chats here. I want to thank everyone who did that. One of them was a shout out to Legend from the Heimlich Maneuver. Thank you, Heimlich, for your super chat. He gave a shout out to Legend with two cats and then said one, two, three, four. I believe that's what it said. Some kind of secret code there that we just dropped for Heimlich. Awesome.
LKJ Aster Heffer said Jehado918U089 said show dogs generals and express butt glands on cam.
I don't think Homer would like that.
I don't think Homer would like that, but thank you for your super chat.
Same person also said I fondle myself and spray out in my own mouth.
I fondle myself and spray out in my own mouth.
LJ
I have to hear Brad's end on this call.
That seems to be in reference to that UPS call that we did at the top of the hour.
Yeah, I kind of hear that too.
Hopefully, I'll be able to hear that tomorrow.
I'm excited about that.
And Walter Hamlichmanover also said,
Criss Cross
Double Time
Because he said his name was Criss
And I said my name was Cross
Where is Homer?
Speaking of anal glands
Where is that boy?
Let me check on him
He's in his bed
He's being a good boy
Okay everybody
Well
Back to the show
405-396-6884
You can call that number
Just like this person is right now
So don't bother calling now
Until you hear this person hang up
Hi thanks for calling
Hey Carlito it's Brendan
Hey Brendan
Brendan from Facebook
This is numbers
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Parkman
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
This is a Parkman number from last week that I called last week.
It's a Titanic thing.
You know, it's a boat that went down.
Thank you for calling the Luxor Show Reservations.
This call may be monitored or recorded for quality purposes.
Para Español, aprima el nueve.
For Show Reservations, press Thank you for calling Show Reservations.
Your call may be recorded for quality assurance.
For new Show Reservations, please press 1.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Please remain on the line, and a representative will be with you momentarily.
Can you hear me?
Yes.
Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if I was getting you.
No, you're good.
Okay.
I'm going to call this aquarium instead, see if they're open.
Where's that at?
Good question. Las Vegas, they've got to be open.
Thank you for calling Shark Reef Aquarium at Mandalay Bay, Nevada's only AZA-accredited animal care facility.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
No, no. I don't want that. Okay, well, no. No to that.
Fuck. Damn it, man.
My number game is not the best today.
Do you still have Lonesome Loser's log of all the numbers he had saved?
I remember you always talked that you had that.
Yeah, they all slowly started becoming disconnected because they're old numbers.
I mean, they go back a long time.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
dahliah dat dat lady apple dot over pulsea he pulled it out of your vagina
you guys are crazy ok no no it was it was you
know you're thinking you had big long pants on you're driving us crazy you
know
ok you that's ok don't worry about it do you have teeth
oh just tell him not time you can be stealing fish because they've been
attracted by the time yet home
well next time he's going to come back he's going to come up with a baseball
bat next time
Laugh Track Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
She sounds Filipino.
You think so?
Yeah, she sounds a little Filipino.
I don't know.
Yeah, I can tell.
Where was that, in California?
That was California, so probably.
You know those people.
You know how they are, yeah.
I'm a little rusty in my prank call game.
I used to be able to do them pretty good, but I don't know.
Since I've gotten older, yeah.
Hey, don't worry.
I feel rusty tonight, too.
Best prank call here.
It happened because of Brad.
If it wasn't for Brad, we'd be fucked.
Another FedEx call?
Uh, no.
No, I'm just saying, if it wasn't for him, the best call...
Hang on, shit.
If it wasn't for him, that call at the beginning of the show wouldn't have happened.
That was great. That made the show.
It's all been downhill ever since.
Oh, yeah.
Here's a golf club.
For Choosing Valley High Golf Club, this is Aaron speaking.
How may I assist you?
Hey, Aaron, that's a girl's name.
Hello?
Yes, sir?
That's a girl's name.
Uh, A-A-R-O-N, sir.
They're two different spellings.
Oh.
Okay.
Okay, yeah sure it is the golf golf club right yes sir tea time reservation good
You having a bachelor party for my bro? He's he's on the line, too
So we wanted to get like do you have anything on Saturday morning Saturday the 13th in the morning?
Huh how many golfers are your party four men and two
How do you say two dancers you have six golfers all together
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I'm going to disconnect this call.
No, no, no.
No, sir.
There's no need to, please.
No, no, no.
Come on, please.
Whatever.
Whatever, dude.
All right.
I'm going to let you go.
I'm going to clear the line for maybe someone else before I take a break.
All right.
All right, buddy.
Brendan?
You there?
All righty.
All right, buddy.
Yeah, no, I'm here.
Thanks for calling in, man.
All right.
I'll talk to you next week, Carlito.
Yeah.
See you later, buddy.
I gotta get I gotta get like you know I gotta get with the show here man
started out so promising 405-396-6884 will net you a spot on this show
Brian says a brain brain brainwash Brian wash says that I should smoke weed you're right for
that I would have to pack a bowl and for that I would have to take a break I'm gonna try one
One more prank before I do that, though.
Let's try that right now.
Hi, had some more?
Yes.
Okay, I wanted to come in.
I wanted to see the fish.
You have fish?
We do not.
Okay, do you have lizards?
We do.
We have some leopard geckos and some bearded dragons.
Oh, bearded dragons.
Excellent.
That's what I'm interested in.
How big do they get?
They require a 40-gallon tank for their whole life.
Okay, and how much water?
They don't...
What do you mean, water?
Well, you said a tank.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
I have made it.
With me here, is there anyone on Skype?
Anyone on Skype?
Is the Skype working?
Matt Hillock, report.
Do not hear Matt Hillock.
Do I even have this shit connected right?
Oh my God.
That's a good question.
Listen to some Rage Against the Machine, folks, while I make sure.
I do know that Homer's in here and DaviCat making an appearance.
Davi hasn't been on camera in a long time.
See him over on the YouTube now.
He's not happy because Homer's about to get on the couch underneath him.
Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
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Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
Oh yeah?
So I don't want to keep on repeating myself.
Is that from sucking dick or did you get punched in the mouth for being a smart?
Okay, well you know what?
You have a good night, okay?
No, you know what?
I just took a piss.
I would like to know who this is.
I don't want to tell you.
Let me talk to Joanna.
She told me to call you.
Okay, well you know what?
You have a good night.
You're an asshole.
If you call up here again, I'll have the police at your house.
You ain't going to do shit.
Have a good night.
Bye-bye.
Motherfucker.
Shit.
I'm going to call back.
Yeah.
I just took a big piss like Matt fucking Hillock.
Are you going to flush the toilet, bro?
I mean, come on.
Hey, dude, Brad Carter.
I just didn't want to be loud.
Yeah, but I shared a room with you.
You didn't flush the toilet twice.
I saw you.
Shut up, Brad.
I was talking to shut up.
No, you shut up.
Motherfucker, you hang up the phone.
I'll hang it up for you.
Oh, shit.
Thank you.
Hi.
Do me a favor.
Don't call here again.
You already said that once and I did it anyway.
What do you think is going to happen now?
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Pizza Pie
Hello
Hello
Is this a big fat share?
Ah
Hello
It's alright
No no she knows the number
She saw the number
On the caller ID
She figured it out
Hey would you like to put the number in chat?
And then I can call it
And it'll come from mine
I believe
Yeah
On party time
Would it?
We could try
Yeah we can't
I think it can
Cause um
Cause on party time
People were calling shit
And Zax was saying
It just goes
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Hello, I'm calling to try to make an order.
Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
Thank you for calling 7-Eleven.
It showed that it was...
Somebody picked up, right?
Someone picked up and I think they heard multiples and they were like,
Oh my god, I'm a fucking, you know, toothpick or snowflake, whatever it is.
They're hacking us.
Dude, I got that.
It's Brad's fault.
I got that.
I don't know if you saw it, Brad, but I got a shirt like the fuck you from Texas.
I like that
It's fucking super
Hey hey hey
I just want to order some
Pizza pie
I just want to order a pizza pie
No you're not ordering nothing from me
Fuck you do your job
We don't give you permission to get mad
How about we call some
Planet Fit and Ice that we received
From Mr. Brad Carter
Let's save the
Who had a beef with this place?
It was me. Thanks for calling, guys.
Hey, you don't have to super chat for that, man.
You're good people.
You're friends.
You're an ally.
I appreciate it.
It was one person.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So, Jack, why didn't you flush the toilet?
What happened?
You were trying to explain.
I put it on mute so y'all couldn't hear.
I didn't want to be interrupted.
I'm pretty fucking drunk right now,
so I don't want to be a fuck, you know what I mean?
What was her name?
Susie?
Sharon.
F-U-C-K?
Sharon, Sharon, Sharon.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
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Madhouse Live
Closed Captioning by The Closed Captioning Project
All right, cheers, guys.
Love y'all.
Love you, Matt.
Love Dana Fitness.
Yeah, all right.
We can't talk.
Free the corporate office, guys.
Come on.
We got to, you know.
Yeah.
Come on, come on.
Matt was saying goodbye.
You don't say goodbye during the corporate office.
Wait, so Matt left?
Really?
He's upset?
Yeah, I don't know why.
He said he was leaving.
He's going to bed early.
Well, what a fucking square, you know?
I wonder why, man, because I said that about diabetes.
I hope not.
Shit.
Hey, let's bitch about going to bed too early for the next three hours.
Yeah.
Yes, that's right.
For the next three weeks, you mean.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Turn that on, and I'm going to watch the computer from this end, and it'll be about maybe 60 seconds.
I'll just wait for it to get to 100%.
You said leave it on for 60 seconds?
Yeah, well, it'll probably be a little bit more than 60 seconds, because it's got to synchronize and everything.
And then as soon as it synchronizes, I'll be able to see where it is.
Give me one moment.
Sorry about that. I'm muting right now.
I'm going to get on my computer.
I don't think it's...
Totally not obvious.
Music exists. I haven't heard this one before.
Hey, real quick, I want to hope everyone's having a good show.
Listening to a good show
Having a good time
Listening to the show
That's what I meant to say
And thank you
Keep having a good show
Good
Good
Good
A better show than yours
Correct
Take that
They got ordered to hang up I think
I think that's what happened
No
Don't worry
Brad's fault
Brad sent plenty of them here
He sent plenty of them
Here we go
Here is the next one
Alright
Thanks for calling guys
I'm going to split
This is Kristen
How may I help you?
Hi this is Cross
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation
Call Nation Madhouse Live
And and shoot for local or matter and then call the fake lawyer yeah
Tendi how may I help you fellow this is Rory from the corporate office of planet Fitness. , I'm calling you to do the weekly customer survey
Do you have a customer in there? I could just do a quick survey with just a minute, okay?
Let me um inform her of what she's Gonna. Do okay, okay? Thank you very much
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Just regular? Okay, you'll be entitled to two months of free black card upgrade for completing this survey.
It's a five-question survey, and it's completely anonymous.
You don't have to give me any of your identifying information, okay?
Okay.
All right, question number one, can I please have your age?
21.
21.
Delicious.
Okay, all right.
How often in a week do you visit this location?
Five times a week.
Five times a week.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Closed Captions by GetTranscribed.com
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Hi, my name is Cross. I'm with the corporate office in Connecticut. How are you doing tonight?
Good, how are you?
I'm good. I'm looking to see if you have a black card member who would be willing to take a five-question survey for three months off of their black card membership.
Uh, sure.
Okay.
Just one moment.
Thank you.
I'd like to know if there's a black card member that's sitting with some guy at corporate and he's wanting to know if there's someone who wants to take a five-question survey of it.
No.
No?
I think it's out
I think it's
making the rounds again not to take these calls
anymore
yeah but Matt's all good I heard what he said
he said he had to go do something
it wasn't because of what anyone said
I'm paranoid
I'm Jag TV
hi Todd
my name is Cross I'm calling from the corporate office in Connecticut
how are you tonight?
pretty good
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Hello? Hello? Hello? Yes, sir. Yes, sir. You said you had a survey for me. Yes. Are you canceling your membership? No. No. Okay. Well, my name is Cross. I'm with the corporate office in Planet Fitness. Don't know if you're aware, but we're headquartered in Connecticut. Thank you very much for taking the time. Are you currently a black card member or not? Yes. Yes. You are? Okay. You will receive two months of free black card membership for completing this survey. And at the end of it, I will be providing the associate who handed you the phone the code to enter a membership.
Closed Captioning by Kris Brandhagen.com
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
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Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
You will you will try the next one here. All right, let's try don't fuck this up jag. Yeah, I probably will
There's a lot riding on this jag. Yes, never coming back on the show again
If you fuck it up washington post is
The washington reports is washington post is reporting that turkish officials have told the u.s
That they have video and audio proof that the uh, that one guy was murdered at the saudi
Killing that fucking journalist.
Shit.
Thank you for calling Planet Fitness.
This is Mark speaking.
How can I help you?
Hi, yes.
I was trying to transfer my associate over to you.
We're calling from the corporate office for a customer survey.
Oh, okie dokie.
And I think that person may have gotten disconnected on accident, and I apologize.
And I may be able to reconnect them here.
Hello, Mr. Okie Dokie?
What happened?
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Hi there, how are you doing? I'm fucked from the corporate office. What is your first name? Bobby. Bobby, how are you doing tonight? Very well. Excellent. You actually I know he said that this was a survey. You're actually our millionth customer in this location, Bobby. Oh, yeah. And we wanted to you see the little security camera up above there by the desk. Yeah, we actually have you up here in the corporate office. We're all gathered around to celebrate. We wanted to give you special benefits as our millionth customer, unlimited access to our
Black Card Membership
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Just put her on the phone one more time if you don't mind.
Alrighty. Apparently he does have some more questions for you.
She just asked what more would she have to do?
We need to get her to say, I'm the one millionth customer, and then that's all we need from her.
I'm sorry, a what?
She's the one millionth customer. All we need to get from her is just one more soundbite.
I'm sorry, it's just very hard to hear you. One more what?
Yeah, my shit's messed up.
One more soundbite from her to scream, like, I'm the one millionth customer.
Just put her on the phone real quick, bud.
Sorry, what was that?
Oh.
Can you hear me okay?
A little bit.
You are getting very fuzzy.
Yeah, my internet's a piece of fucking shit.
We need to get one more soundbite from her.
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
We just need one more soundbite from you.
For the commercial.
For the commercial.
Yeah.
Would another member suffice?
Yes, yeah, no problem cross. Can you guys hear me a little better? Yes, we can. Okay. Yeah. Okay, Mark. I appreciate it. But sorry about that. You just need them to say that they're the 1 millionth customer or? Yeah, well, I need them on the phone though. So I can explain to them. Okie dokie. Okie dokie. Hello. Hi there. Is this Bobby? Or is this a new customer? Okay. Okay. That was a good answer to the question. You're a 1 millionth customer. How do you feel? We're going to give you free black
Black Card Membership for the Year
A free Black Card Membership for the Year?
Yeah, all you have to do is scream like,
Yeah, I'm the one millionth customer
because we're recording this for the commercial.
Hello?
I'm sorry, she just handed the phone back to me.
Oh, is there another one?
Because all we need for them to do is to yell
that they're the one millionth customer.
You know what we can do, sir?
Just to wrap this up for Bobby, the original one,
if we can just get you saying really loud and excited
for the commercial, just say,
Call Nation Madhouse Live
people on on both sides on both sides that's right i mean did they get the the main idea
though on that before i started fucking up yeah yeah i would have fucked in the pussy i want to
get fucked in the pussy she's like what she didn't she didn't know what to say to that yeah all right
all right another one another one yeah i don't think we've done this one yet oh did you get my
number on facebook cross oh yeah you did you want me to be perverted to your friend what a great
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
So this is where you like to drink the beers.
I flushed the toilet that time.
What did you try to order in Chicago that first night that they ended up giving us Sprite and vodka or something?
It was your turn to order a Cherry Bomb, right?
Yeah, Cherry Bomb, which I had drank like four of them tonight at the property.
Thank you for calling Roosters at 1500-431-47.
Nook and Nook
Nook and Nook
Prank World
JackTV Hangs Out
Become a Patreon Subscriber
Hello
Hello
Yes, hi
How you doing?
Is Katie there?
Good, how are
Is who?
Katie
Katie who?
Katie BBY
This is Pickerington Roosters
Closed Captions by GetTranscribed.com
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
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Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
SuperFuck What Happened?
I'm looking on Facebook.
I put it in the...
Oh, I can put it on Facebook.
I can put it in the machine.
Now you have it on the machine.
Okay, alright.
Let me get it.
I had to install it.
I got it, I got it, I got it.
Do you think, do you think...
Brad, what do you think Microsoft is gonna do on the first of November?
Do you think they're really gonna stick to their guns?
It seems like they're going to this time.
What's happening on the first of November?
They kill old Skype for new Skype apparently.
Finally, they've been putting it off cause they had a hard date like a month ago and
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
I hate the old ones.
I thought they said turn off the new Skype.
No, fuck that.
Turn it off.
I thought they said that.
We need something new.
Thank you for calling Roosters at 1500 Stone Creek, Pickerington, Ohio.
Shit, sorry.
Our hours of operation are Monday through Thursday from 11 a.m. to 1215 a.m.
Friday from 11 a.m.
What do I hit?
One?
One.
And Sunday from 11 a.m. to 1115 p.m.
To place a carryout order for pickup, please press...
As for Gianna this time, I put the wrong number like a fucking drunk.
So is this the right number you're putting in there?
Yeah, sorry about that. I'm fucking gay.
Hello, Gianna?
Hello.
Gianna? Is Gianna there?
You have the wrong number.
Don't start that again. Let me talk to this girl.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Fucking slut.
Bitch.
Why are you getting in the way of my pussy?
All right, so I'll call the right number now.
This is a different place we're calling now, right?
Sorry.
All right, it's all right.
Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm gay.
Sorry, could be gay, sorry.
I asked for Big Fat Bella.
Bella, or Gianna now, Bella?
Bella.
Yeah, and then you speak to Big Fat Bella?
I'm sorry?
Karaoke.
The big girl, Bella, the big girl?
She's doing karaoke.
Yeah, who's calling?
My name's Cross.
Okay, hold on a second.
All right.
Fucking white people.
Yeah, fucking whites, right?
Hey, Bella.
Hey, Big Bella, how you doing?
What?
Big Belly Bella, hey, this is Cross.
I'm a big fan of the karaoke there.
Okay, are you coming in?
Whoa, you need to turn that shit down.
This is Cross. I'm a fan, and I wanted to do some karaoke, but you need to turn that shit down.
Okay, buddy. I don't know who you are, but don't call up here.
Hey, can I ask if you have a certain song for the karaoke?
Big Belly Bella.
Yeah, that's a thing. If your name is Bella...
Yeah, Big Belly Bella.
Yeah, Big Belly.
Call him back.
Hell yeah. Talk shit about her, Piper.
Hey, Big Coach. How you doing? Is that Bella?
No, this is Robin.
Why does she hang up on me, Big Belly Bella?
Well, why are you calling her that?
Well, we're friends.
We're friends.
She just doesn't know who I am.
I was just joking.
Well, but if you're friends and you know women at all, you know that's not a nice thing to say.
Well, she's got a big belly.
I mean, it doesn't stop me none.
I eat her pussy all the time.
It's true.
She's got dyke hair, too.
Her hair's short as fuck.
It's dyke.
There's some good pussy underneath all that fat, I'll tell you what.
You're a fucking dick.
I'm being real.
I'm mean.
Is she big?
Is she a big girl for real?
She's a little bit big, yeah.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I apologize if you were calling and I wasn't answering. I wasn't paying attention. My bad.
I got voicemails.
I gotta grab another. I gotta grab another brew.
Oh, that's exactly what you need, yep.
Oh, shit. Obi was saying it's time to call Joey Guns. He sent a super chat.
He said about time to call Joey Guns. Let's do that.
How long has it been? Like two months?
It's been at least a month. Let's see here.
At least a month?
Yeah, at least a month. It's a beer. What's that place called?
Uh-huh, I got it. I got a save.
Thank you, Google.
You're welcome.
Yeah, hey looking for Joey this is cross
Yeah, cross for looking for Bella. You call the wrong place cross this
Bella yeah, no one thing motherfucker come over here your fucking week split. I'll tell you that hey don't star shake
I know Joey guns. So go over there kick your ass
Yeah, you're gonna eat I'll make you my fucking shoes, you know, yeah, you're gonna eat a motherfucker
Alibaba
Ed
from money man
I got my mind
waiting for you
bitch
Ed's a motherfucker
do you know where I'm at
motherfucker
ok
I called the wrong place
oh shit
yeah that was
coaches again
is Ed a scary guy
will he kill you
no Ed's a pussy
Ed's a pussy
he doesn't got a 9
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank
I need to speak with Joey.
What was that?
Joey.
Joey who, sir?
Joey Guns, the bouncer.
Can I help you?
Is this Jim?
I'm sorry, what was that?
He had me coming in to do some work over there, and his ass isn't picking up the phone.
What's going on?
Hold on, sir.
You've reached the manager.
How can I help you?
Well, I'm supposed to talk to Joey.
He had an arrangement with me to come up to the bathroom and do some work.
Up to the bathroom?
Yeah, to do some work.
Don't argue.
Don't argue.
Put Joey on, idiot.
We're the fucking contractors.
Contracts.
Instead of the managers picking up.
I'll call back.
Joey's gonna get in trouble.
What the fuck you calling here talking to my manager?
Thank you for calling Beer Authority, this is Rebecca, how can I help you?
Yeah, Rebecca, I'm calling Joey back.
Sure, um, just give me one second, sorry.
Thank you, honey.
She's the same one from always that always gets them.
I think.
Rebecca here.
And here we are, waiting on Big Joey the gun machine.
Yeah.
We reached the private bowling room.
Yeah.
There's that machine again.
Brendan sending another number. Thank you, Brendan.
Thanks, Brendan.
I get a few more calls in here, then we're going to have to play voicemail.
And then that's the show.
Oh.
Sorry, sorry.
It's not like you've been on for three and a half hours.
Right.
Brad, if we move the show, this California meetup to like later, not March.
If we did maybe like June or something, could you still make it?
Please.
Oh, yeah, I'm sure I could.
It's not that far.
It's like eight hours for me.
We gotta convince Matt and Zach to fuckin' slow their roll on it and pump their brakes.
We need time.
Or we can just wait and do Chicago again.
I don't think I can do California in six months, but it's late right now.
I'll be in Illinois in Nino next summer again.
Well, we'll do that.
But I want West Coast, man.
Fuck California.
We need to go to California to see Milkman.
Everyone's real excited about California.
Yeah, it's full.
Waiting on Joey here. He's probably getting a talking to from his boss.
Joey, this is the last straw.
We gonna have to let you go.
You keep getting fuckin' people in here and startin' shit.
I don't care what people call you.
The funny thing is that Joey was cool as fuck when I had him in the other shoot.
He hung up. He knows. He knows. God damn it.
Joey, it's been a month. How does he remember that shit?
Yeah, I don't know. Fucking guy.
Alright, what's this last number you sent in here?
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I think it's 1?
Alright.
Speak with the Rule 3 representative, please.
Yep.
Rule 3, this is Sean. How may I help you?
Hey, Sean, is Kana there? Kana, the girl with the big butt?
No.
Yay!
What did he say?
He said, that's all he said.
Well, that's for the other girl.
Sean's a pussy.
Yeah, Sean's a little pussy.
He lights things on fire.
Thank you for calling Rule 3.
We are open Sunday.
John Lennon's Treehouse is on fire and shit.
Kid's in it?
Yeah.
Oh, I'm right up.
No.
No, screw that up.
Oh, shit.
It's called Brennan's number here.
Pauly's Pub and Grill in Illinois.
If it's Pauly, ask for Pauly or ask for Crystal.
Okay, so this is about right, about what you've been doing.
This is coming from someone else there.
Brad, do you want to try it?
I mean, I don't know what you say.
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Madhouse Live
Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
3-0-7
I got that.
Alright, well, I ain't gonna work.
I'll try one more time.
You may pick up an anger.
He's got that Napoleon complex thing going on.
I just want to apologize to him, that's all.
You know what I could go for right now?
Some bubble bombs.
Hello?
Fucking Buster Casey, I lagged out because of you.
...to an automatic voice message system.
3-0-1
He's just giving that a few buttons, yeah.
Alright, gentlemen, I'm going to clear the things.
Thank you for joining.
It's been great. Thanks for numbers from both of you and the three of you, I guess because Buster's back. Yep. Yep. See you guys
Snowplow
Everyone check snowplow show and Jag do you have a site or you just do your thing somewhere Jag TV the Jag TV
Just YouTube youtube.com slash Jag TV network, you know, all right and Buster Casey dot biz by shirts. All right
I'm starting shows now. So yeah
Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
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Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation
Call in to Sharon and Johanna
Carlito, there's a Pizza Hut number that is trying to come to you.
And the acting managers right now are Johanna and Shoshanna.
Something like that. Fucking get to it.
Okay. Alright. So you had people call me? Alright. I didn't catch it.
It would have been fun. Maybe. Maybe.
The Riley Appealing Hollywood Heartthrob Who Carried On A Long Love Affair With Movie Goers
Even Though His Performances Were Often More Memorable Than The Films That Contained Them
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
Burt Reynolds is a self-mocking charmer with laugh-crinkled dark eyes, a rinkish mustache, and a hairy chest that he often bared on screen.
Was he self-mocking, Burt Reynolds?
There are too many movies to list, but some of Reynolds' films you may remember would be
Spokie and the Bandit, Deliverance, The Longest Yard, The Dukes of Hazzard, or maybe The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas.
Oh, come on, man. You didn't give shout-outs in one of my favorite movies, fucking Boogie Nights, man.
Come on, man. Heather Graham tits? What's up?
Rennels Battled An Addiction To Prescription Medication After His Jaw Was Shattered In The Fight Scene
An Accident That Left Him Wisened And Led To False Whispers That He Was Dying Of AIDS
And He Even Posed Heartfully Nude As A Centerfold In An Issue Of Cosmopolitan Magazine At One Time
Burt Once Stated, I May Not Be The Best Actor In The World, But I'm The Best Burt Reynolds In The World
I appreciate it and we'll catch you next obituary next week.
I usually would play a song for the obituary, but that is not a singer and I'm not going to be playing like the theme to Deliverance because fuck that, man.
I get nightmares.
I can't hear that too late at night.
I'll dream about it.
That's some scary shit.
I saw that movie.
I was like seven years old.
I really should not have seen that movie when I saw it, man.
It really fucked me up.
I was like, why is that one guy getting behind him and trying to jump over him and he can't?
Okay, probably.
Humble.
Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
You know what I'm talking about, John Goodman.
Yeah, here's Jack TV's voicemail.
TV, usually I call this number and leave stupid shit like I scream or I sing songs for no reason or I have sex and make sex noises.
I want you to do a serious call.
Thank you for all that you do.
Thank you for coming up with great ideas because I'm stealing a lot of them.
I'm giving you credit, though.
Yay.
Everyone, head on over to madhouselive.com slash donate and or patreon.com slash prank call nation.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Carlito, I need my penis pump back because Milkman just texted me and said he needs to borrow it.
So if you can please give back my penis pump and the horse pumper, I'd appreciate it.
All right, thanks for that.
All right, everyone, thanks for...
Thanks for everyone who left voicemail.
Thanks for everyone who tuned in to the show machine.
God damn it.
Let me do a quick, real quick check.
I'm not going to give shout-outs really anymore.
I'm not going to give shit out as far as people come, whatever, links.
But let me just take another look, see if anyone did this.
Jack TV donated through Super Chat.
Thank you.
He said horse.
Thank you.
And the phone company donated.
Wow, the phone company.
Excellent.
It was about time, you motherfuckers.
You got a lot of money out of me in the 90s, you sons of bitch, you.
The fuck you guys think you are?
Your fucking long distance rates.
Having me calling my family in Puerto Rico on a Sunday.
because it was cheaper.
All right, guys, I'll be back here next week.
Next week.
Next week.
Be sure to keep attuned to the Prank Call Nation story of friends.
Man, I'm losing it.
Dwight McClanahan on Saturday nights.
Tune into that.
Brad Carter's on on the PCN per se, but he's affiliated, and he's on all the time.
He'll probably have a show released tomorrow.
Check him over at phonelosers.org.
All right.
I got to go.
I got to go take a shit in the toilet.
Motherfuckers
Thanks for tuning in
Bye
Thank you Spector Ratchet
Tricking you into listening to music on my channel
Son of a bitch
Son of a bitch
Son of a bitch
Son of a bitch

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