Mushroom Sauce – 10/25/2018 Show
25 Oct 2018 · 2 h 13 min · 9,734 words · source
Calls (28, 57 min of 2 h 13 min)
- Selling Pokemon cards with devil claims live 4.3 min clip ↓
- Calling about Pokemon cards from Natomas live 1.6 min clip ↓
- Amish Traditions Furniture Store asked for cards live 48 s clip ↓
- Amish Traditions Furniture Store asked for cards live 2.3 min clip ↓
- Call Nation asked about wooden bed live 3.6 min clip ↓
- Call Nation asked about book titles live 2.1 min clip ↓
- Walmart shopper asked for egg drop soup live 2.6 min clip ↓
- Call to Big Casey about Pokemon cards live 48 s clip ↓
- Caller waiting for car at Walmart bathroom live 2.1 min clip ↓
- Pokemon cards for daughter live 2.8 min clip ↓
- Lab tech job inquiry with urination interruption live 3.1 min clip ↓
- California Gymnastics asked about classes live 1.3 min clip ↓
- California Gymnastics voicemail left voicemail 5.8 min clip ↓
- Walmart Pokemon card incident call voicemail 3.3 min clip ↓
- California Gymnastics missed call voicemail 33 s clip ↓
- Craigslist card message playback playback 3.8 min clip ↓
- Calling 405-396-6884 to test connection live 33 s clip ↓
- Sushi bar order prank live 48 s clip ↓
- Topgolf Las Vegas automated menu ivr 48 s clip ↓
- Call Nation caller about overnight treatment live 1.8 min clip ↓
- Call Nation caller about DeLorean and cactuses live 33 s clip ↓
- Call Nation caller about GTA 6 and Vice City live 33 s clip ↓
- Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgender Hotline live 1.1 min clip ↓
- Plexiderm Skin Care caller named Cross live 2.1 min clip ↓
- Flex Center Skin Care skin cream inquiry live 2.8 min clip ↓
- Black Skin and Skin Care ball size discussion live 1.1 min clip ↓
- Flixiterm about quality insurance live 33 s clip ↓
- Caller Dwight McClanaghy Hanks about Pokemon cards live 3.8 min clip ↓
Transcript
Well, hello there!
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation
Madhouse Live
The Prank Call World
Yeah, for real, man.
That Chicago meetup.
Jesus Christ, what a bunch of fatties.
I mean, goddammit.
Let's do a pranky call.
Let's have some fun tonight.
Hope y'all having a good week.
We'll get to everything in a minute.
Bap People Nation.
Thanks, Bap.
B-A-P, Big Bap.
Listen to the Bap Show.
Back Alley Pranks on Mixler.
It's a good show.
It's crazy.
Drop some acid and listen to that.
Hello?
Hey, how you doing?
I was communicating with you regarding the Pokemon cards.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, I'm gonna get this shit. I gotta get this fucking shit out of here. Okay
My fucking kid what I caught a masturbating to homosexual pornography on the internet when I got home today from work
I got home early. Ah, and we can't have that in this house. I took away all the Stan Pokemon cards
Okay, he ain't getting shit anymore. He there's a good 100 200 Pokemon cards here
Okay, are you a seller? Do you sell them or is this for your kids? No
My nephew likes to play with those cards, and he told me he's still collecting.
Because I think part of what's going on is that the Pokemon cards have the devil in them, too.
So if you're okay with that, then you can have all these cards.
What do you mean by that? I have no clue about what those cards are.
Well, it's like a game that the kids play, but they put satanic-like things in them, in the cards.
My Son Playing With Homosexual Attractions
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
I believe in God
I'm a Christian
I don't know about dragon or anything like that
I believe in God
I believe in God
C.C.
Do you want the Pokemon cards?
Yes, I will get it.
When are you coming?
Where do you want me to meet you?
Can you meet me at the Wal-Mart?
You call me when you're at Wal-Mart and I'll be there.
Wal-Mart?
Is it the one on the whole meal?
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, I know that is.
I know where that is.
How long will it take?
How long will it take you?
Probably 20 minutes.
20 minutes?
Okay, call me when you're there.
I'll be there.
I'm gonna go there now but you call me when you're there and then I'll find you okay okay okay okay okay please don't don't make me go and waste gas all right and not come all right you coming for real oh yeah okay all right bye bye oh what's your name my name is horse how to spell it h-o-r-s-e a horse yeah okay that's my name is melanie okay bye all right melanie okay see ya okay bye honey bye bye baby all right
Selling no we're giving away Pokemon Pokemon card machines with the devil with the devil in them yeah
that's what we call a normal call clearing I'm still unsure why that happened but it does
don't worry folks we got parkman numbers and all that stuff hello answer so yeah parkman
Get to them all.
Be excited.
Yeah, hi.
You contacted me regarding Pokemon cards?
Uh, yeah.
How's it going?
Uh, terrible right now.
Very bad.
I'm sorry to hear.
I need to get rid of the damn cards as soon as possible.
Okay.
My son's not gonna make it.
Huh?
I'm sorry?
No, you go ahead.
Oh, I'm just saying I can leave right now.
I live in Natomas.
Oh, yeah?
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Salaam Alaikum Insha'a'a'la I don't know all right well you need to learn
more we'll talk about that oh I'm on my way bye okay a lot of people at the
Walmart's motherfucker and we're gonna swat them yeah let's be rude to one
Madhouse Live
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Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Madhouse Prank Calls
That Are Made Off The Madhouse Show Basically
Alright You Get It
I Hope You Understand Guys
If You Want To Join In Tonight You Can
You Can Call In And Be A Caller
You Can Do Pranks Or Just Say Hi Or Sit In For A Prank
Whatever You Want
405-396-6884
Once Again That's
405-39-MOUTH
405-396-6884
Call In Why Don't You
Ginger Ale Canada Dry
Diet Of Course
Closed Captioning by Dania Yamout
This guy's leaving in a little, but it's going to take him a half damn hour to get there.
All right, here's another Pokemon one, and then we'll do some other stuff for a little bit.
Let's do this.
Be rude really quick.
We have reached the voicemail box of...
Hello?
Yeah, hi.
I'm calling about the Pokemon fucking cards.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, you want them?
Yeah, I do.
I would like them for my grandson.
Yeah, well, my son got caught.
He was doing a satanic ritual, so we're taking away all the satanic Pokemon cards.
We asked our pastor about it.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
What do you mean?
Well, I mean, I don't know if it's true or not.
And why are you eating when I'm talking to you on the phone?
Oh, okay.
Yeah, I was like, you're either eating, you're walking, or you're, you know.
But maybe you're fucking or something.
All right.
No, come on. Free cards. Free cards.
I got her scared.
Oops. All right.
Amish Traditions Furniture Store
Call Before 8
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Back From The Bathroom
Taking A Shit
Yeah Motherfuckers
If I Can Find My Shitting Sound Effect
I Found A Better One
Oh Yeah I Wanted To
Dude This Is Fucked Up
So This Is Supposed To Play In The Intro
But This Is
This Is The Racist Robocall
That Was Calling People In Florida
From The Nazi Group
About Andrew Gillum
Who's The Democrat Who's Running
And Probably Gonna Win In Florida
Hopefully He Does
I'm Just Saying Cause Dude
I'll tell you that if I remember afterwards.
I don't care what he be thinking but a white man's medicine which is very specific
Psst medicine
Cause it uses science and what not
But the medicine of my African race be very affordable
For instance putting the chicken feets under your pillow during the full moon don't cost hardly nothing at all
So I promise that you make me Andrew Dillard the governor of every people's wuffy ailin will get all the chicken feets they need
This message came from by theroadtopower.com
Yeah, The Road to Power, let's hear it for them.
I went to the site, and it's this fucking really weird fucking white guy.
He looks like a tall elf.
He just has very elf-ine features, and his show sucks.
And he's in Idaho.
Why is he fucking involved?
Why does he fucking care?
Stick to Idaho, bro.
Go whiten up Idaho with your white supremacist views and keep your hands off of Florida.
Jesus.
I swear.
WDBO 580 AM
Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I don't know. I don't listen to racist radio from the 1930s, so I don't know.
I'm going to tell it to you, Chris.
Hello there.
Hi there.
My name is Negro Andrew Gillum.
Okay.
And I was looking for a bed.
Okay.
Does you make the bed out of wood?
Yes.
And that wood, what kinds of wood does it be?
All different kinds. All Midwestern American woods.
And will it hold up when I fuck my wife?
Yes.
How much weight can I put on there?
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I'm trying to see if any of your locations carry them.
They're not the most popular books.
All right.
Okay, I'm ready for that first title.
All right, the first one is uh-uh-uh, I think it is.
It's UGH, three times, uh-uh-uh.
Do you have an author on that one?
I do not.
Seeing anything with three repeated uhs.
Okay, nothing with three repeated uhs.
All right, scratch that then.
Do you have Go Make Me a Sandwich?
God dammit
I'm not throwing anything for that one either
Alright I got three left here
Let's see hopefully you got at least one of these
Cause I need them for a project
Report is coming up
My eye hit the doorknob
I'm not immediately seeing anything
Do you have an author for that one
Melinda Torres
I don't see anything by that author
Alright let's see if you got this one
I'm gonna throw you down the stairs you fucking woman you
Do you have an author on that one
Yeah Flash Floods
I'm Not Seeing Any Records For That Uh Being A Book Anywhere Are You Sure You Have The Author Correct
Yeah They'll Go To My Last One Is Let's See Here I Got A Book Did I Just Give You The One By
Flash Floats All Right The Other One Is Women Are Inferior The Story Of A Dumb Girl Who Didn't
Know How To Look Up Books Hurry Up Let's Go Let's Fucking Go Are You Uh Would You Like To Find
What's wrong?
Why is your big nose so close to the receiver?
Why is your big woman nose so close to the receiver?
You're good. You stop.
Is there a manager I can talk to?
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Yeah, hey, how you doing?
Good, you won the Pokemon cards.
Did you bring me egg drop soup?
What's that?
Egg drop soup.
You take chicken, chicken broth, or bouillon in water.
You bring it to a boil.
You add cornstarch, and you mix it together.
Then you beat an egg, and you drizzle the egg into the boiling water.
Did you not give me...
That's not Chinese food.
Oh, okay.
What's Chinese food?
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I'm in the toilet.
Okay.
Yeah.
You want the...
I'm waiting.
I'm waiting by the pharmacy.
Okay.
All right.
All right.
I'll be right there.
I've just got to wash up here.
I had diarrhea.
Really bad diarrhea.
Oh.
Yeah.
And you can't come in here, right?
You can't come in here.
Are you kidding me?
Huh?
Are you kidding me?
No, no.
I'm not killing you.
No.
Are you kidding me?
No.
I wouldn't do that.
I wouldn't hurt you.
And I don't even know you.
And I'm not a person that hurts people.
Did you ask me to go to the bathroom?
Well, no, you can't. That's what I'm saying. You're not allowed to. This is for this is for boys in here, not for girls. You know, you're bad. OK, look, I'll be right out. Just come wait in front of the toilets. All right. By the register. OK. All right. Bye. I got to take a shit. All right. Bye. See you. I think she's fine. She's good. Even if it's a waste of time, she'll pick up some stuff. She sounds like a Walmart shopper. The other guys there, too. Oh, no. Someone else. We're still waiting for that person to arrive.
I hope you guys are having fun with the show.
Hello.
Hi, is this Big Casey?
This is Casey.
Oh, that's a boy's name.
You know what?
When I texted it, I was voice texting, and so it automatically wrote it up in the boy's name.
My name is actually spelled K-A-Z-I-E.
Uh-huh.
Okay.
So, yep.
Hey.
Oh, man.
I'm going to spoil it.
Oh, what's that?
It gets sick.
I have the boobs, you know.
Did you want me to spoil it?
Are you there?
Yeah.
She wants the Pokemon cards.
I'm sorry, I'm barely able to hear you right now.
Did you want the Pokemon cards?
Yes, I did.
Okay.
Do you want to use the Walmarts?
Sure.
What Walmart is it?
Hang on.
Okay.
Hang on, let me get out of here first.
Okay.
All right, there we go.
That's better.
Oh, now I can hear you much better.
Yeah, I was in the toilet.
I was taking a shit in the toilet, you know?
Oh, come.
Taking a shit in the toilet.
Oh.
All right.
So, you know the Walmart?
My husband knows it.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I thought two was kind of low it was echoey but a low kind of echo all right so this person
said they were getting in the shower let's try to call
uh what the fuck let's try to call back oh here's a caller
Hello?
Uh, hey there. I just pulled up at Walmart.
Oh, hey. Yeah, I'm inside. I'm in the toilet.
Uh, I'm sorry?
Uh, I'm inside the Walmart. I'm inside now.
It's hard to understand you right now.
Toilet. I'm in the toilet right now.
Oh. Oh, at Walmart?
Yeah.
Oh, okay. Sorry about that. All right. I'll see you in a few minutes.
Can you come in here?
Uh, yeah.
All right. Well, I'll meet you at the pharmacy, or can you come into the bathroom, like, where the bathrooms are?
Uh, yeah. I'll come out over there.
Okay.
They all say it's hard to understand. I just want a fucking toilet echo. I wanted to sound like I'm in the shit
Okay, all right, let's try
Here's another person that was looking for a Pokemon car. Hello. I do want them but at the moment
I'm waiting for my car to get back
I'm taking a shit right now.
You're what?
Really? Shit.
I'm outside of the bathrooms in front of the store.
Let me call him again.
I'm going to tell him I'm an Asian
Chinese lady at the pharmacy.
Still in here.
No worries. I'll be out here whenever you're done.
No rush.
Can you go get me a pair
of rustler jeans?
Can you check to see if they have
size 42 rustler jeans?
42 to 30?
I can't understand. Should I just come in there? I don't know.
Yeah, just come in here, please. I'm right here. I'm in the handicapped stall.
Still having trouble hearing me.
Oh, God. He's headed back. He's headed into there.
Do a light, like a little, just a little touch of echo.
I think this might do it. Just a little touch, a little touch.
Yeah, that might do it.
That's a little more realistic.
All right, cool.
All right, shitting in the toilet today with the Pokemon cards.
Yeah, this one goes out to Bill Cosby.
Anyway, I'm gonna go back to the Parkman numbers or let me try some swap shops first real quick
Even get some swap shot action while I take a shit because I'm a child
I'm really and you know the childish pranks that I do
Juvenile, I don't know why you people even listen to this thing this thing. We call that texting me now
He says he's not seeing anyone inside. I don't see anyone. It's so high
Hi, my dogger would love the cards, if still available.
All right, we could do that.
Let's see.
Yeah, hey, can you hear me okay?
Yeah, I hear you, bud.
Oh, good.
Yeah, I'm still in here because I'm, you know.
Which bathroom did you go to?
I'm back at layaway.
It's hard to get in.
Are you at the front?
Yeah, I'm masturbating now.
Oh, I'm on the phone outside the front.
I'm outside the bathroom on the phone.
Okay, all right.
Do you want to come in and help me masturbate, and then we can do this thing?
I'm here now you know I figured you came down okay but I won't hurt you or
nothing at least my not won't use my teeth or anything you know no okay bye
come on I'll give you the cards I'll give you cards yeah that's okay that
moment he notices it was all a waste of time making him waste that gas tonight
yeah here's the person who wants it for his daughter or hers I don't know make
Hello?
Yeah.
Hi.
Can you hear me okay?
Yeah.
I can hear you.
Oh, I'm in the toilet, you know.
Thanks, man.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
I have to do my business.
While I do my business.
Okay.
This is about the Pokemon cards?
Yes.
Okay.
And do you collect them or sell or play or?
No.
My daughter collects them.
Okay.
But this is for boys.
It's for what?
It's for boys.
It doesn't have to be.
Well, it's supposed to be.
Well, then maybe we're not the right people for you to give them to them.
Well, no, you do what you want.
I mean, I'm just warning you, you know.
I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be for boys.
Well, she already has some of them, so.
Oh, and she plays and everything?
How old is she?
She eight?
My son's eight.
No, she's 15.
Oh, hang on.
I'm flushing the toilet over here.
Oh, okay.
I'm poking my car, guys.
Yeah.
You know what, man?
I'm good.
Thank you.
I'm good.
Thanks, bye.
Is she lesbian?
Some guy's calling me taking a shit.
Yeah, lady.
Cuz I'm Carlito the king of prank calls yeah yeah we did the bookstore that was from Parkman
let's try the lab techs that are needed they need lab techs see what I can do with that
hey how you doing honey how are you okay I see that you're looking for lab tech you have a lab
tech job yes okay I'm looking to see if I can get in are you the interviewing manager for this or
are you just a girl that answers the phone I am the recruiting person I'm the recruiter on the
Closed Captioning by Kris Brandhagen.com
Okay.
Thanks.
Anything else I can help you with?
You were checking into something for me regarding the job.
Well, what I report to, man or woman?
Can't hear you.
Well, it's because I'm urinating.
Hang on, I'm almost done.
Man, I tell you, like these beers, they go right through me, you know?
It's like the minute you pee once after you drink a beer, you can't stop, you know?
For the rest of the night.
Oh, it's the worst.
I'm washing my hands here.
Alright.
Taking pees.
It's true, though, man. When you're drinking after that first pee, forget it.
The floodgates are open.
Hi, how you doing?
Fine, how can I help you?
I married a ladyboy in Las Vegas, and I didn't know until the honeymoon.
You mean transsexual?
Whatever.
Is that what you mean?
Where I'm from, we say ladyboy.
Okay. So you thought it was a woman, but it's a boy.
Well, it was a lie, is what the whole thing is.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
Closed Captioning by Kris Brandhagen. brandhagen.com
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call has been forwarded to an automatic voice message system.
POKEMON CARD
The Nevada Quick Divorce
Security Officer John
Leon Shetler Security
Officer in Charge
I'm not in at this time
Those people
California Gymnastics
Let's do it
Got a reuse idea here from a couple years ago
Is this California Gymnastics?
California Gymnastics
California Gymnastics
Yes it is
Good good
I'm looking to get some information
Regarding your classes
Sure
How old is your son or daughter
Uh
Well
I have a son
He is nine
Are you interested in classes for him
Well yeah
But I need to see how the classes are conducted
Before I let him come in
I'd like to come and watch
A class or two
Just to see how it goes
And bring him around
See if he can get accustomed
To it
Yeah yeah
That's not
That's not a problem at all
You're more than welcome to come in
We've got boys classes
Let's see
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation
Madhouse Live
I cut holes in the blanket for my eyes uh no no and I watch I watch you know I guess uh-huh
uh-huh she doesn't know what to do she don't know what to do let's call back see if we can
get a hold of coach Matt coach Matt coach Matt Coach Matt Hellock he's gonna be sitting like
I've got a burka made out of a comfort hello hi you've reached California Gymnastics we're sorry
we missed your call please leave us a brief message and we'll get back to you as soon as
I have an idea for that later because they provided two numbers I would like to call the second number using the number now that I just called the first number as the caller ID and being like hey I just found the cell phone man I gotta find there was this prank I want to say it was a year ago guys and I haven't heard it since I did it but I remembered it at random while I was pooping a couple days ago maybe someone out there knows off the top what episode it might have been but I have been provided a list of like the association
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I don't care whatever no big fucking deal right you do what you want let's check out Pokemon as I see it let's refresh the page I don't think we got anything new ready called them all no it looks like we're good all right there's this one here all right cool I was gonna say get them out of your ass this has been a while since I did that Dwight at the gym under a rug he has the comforter I sweat more this way good good sweat on get your sweat on with Dwight bring out your shirt and drink it please leave your message for
That's what I heard.
Call him back.
Not looking good.
Please leave your message.
Fine, asshole.
Do you okay?
So science spinners.
So the breaking news is that three more devices were discovered, I believe, in Miami.
Maybe.
I saw that police and federal officials were in Miami.
They were also saying that it looks like the devices were being sent out from the Opelika
post office that's down in South Florida.
I believe that's north of Miami.
Or maybe, no, no, south.
Yeah.
Thank you for calling Carlito.
Hello, this is Carlito.
Hey.
Hi.
Hey, how's it going?
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
It's T-Falcon.
I call Brad sometimes.
Hey.
I heard you on there.
Hey.
You're like, hey.
You know, like that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
How you doing?
What do you want?
I'm doing all right.
What do you want, boy?
Oh, I was wondering if there was a way I could make a prank call somehow with you.
Sure.
I got some job calls.
I'll throw some out.
You tell me what sticks.
Sign spinners needed.
Mental health worker.
And foreclosure service.
A natural holistic medical shop.
An Adidas store.
I got a sushi bar.
I got a golf place.
Online bilingual assistant job.
The White Owl Social Club.
How about a sushi bar?
Can you do a sushi bar?
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I was going to just kick your ass.
I just said I wanted to bring you to the Muay Thai place.
I was just going to beat you up for fun.
Yeah, but they didn't pick up.
So as you heard, all right, sign spinners, you know what they do?
They spin signs and they dance.
They get you to get you to go places.
All right.
This is in Reno, Nevada.
Okay.
Damn it, man.
Please leave your message for Manny Mendoza.
This is the break sometimes.
This is how it goes.
Mental health worker, I guess.
Hey, just be my kid here.
I'm going to do the Pokemon cards.
We'll call this guy back.
Okay, yes, Pokemon cards.
That'd be awesome.
Hello, this is Thomas.
Hey, Thomas.
This is Cross.
I'm here on,
I got my son with me
regarding the Pokemon cards.
Okay.
I'm at the Walmart now.
Uh-huh.
All right.
And?
So where would you like to meet
here at the Walmart?
Oh, you're the dude's husband?
Yeah, I'm Casey's husband.
Oh, cool.
I thought she was going to come,
you know, bring her, you know.
Yeah, she was stuck with,
stuck with kids.
So I was able to come down instead.
All right.
I got my son here also with me he's on the phone okay hey boy yeah yeah yeah yeah so I don't know
if she told you what happened but I caught him doing like satanic stuff with the cards
okay all right he was masturbating on top of the cards he had them all lit out in his bed
and he was masturbating had his pants around his ankles and his feet and he my favorite's
the desk props yeah the desk props it's like I'm skull fucking yeah do your kids play this stuff
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I'm gonna go ahead and let you go.
No, please don't. Come on.
Just come into the room.
And you guys, please do not contact me again.
We're in the bathroom.
It's just on the desk.
We're in the bathroom.
Do not contact him.
I'm gonna call your wife real quick, though.
Tell her something about it.
You know what?
What?
Who the hell are you?
What are you trying to do?
You're very strange.
I caught my son masturbating and saying satanic things on top of the Pokemon cards in his bedroom.
Closed Captions by GetTranscribed.com
I'm a Christian, we go to church on Christmas and Easter, that's it.
I mean, I believe in Jesus, but it's not like I'm Charlie Church or something like that.
Do you want something that I came on, you weirdo?
He didn't come, he didn't.
It was just one card, it was just one card.
Oh yeah, he's a virgin, he doesn't come that much.
What the hell are you talking about?
He doesn't have any diseases, he's a virgin.
I don't want my children to have undiseased come on weird stuff.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Closed Captioning by The Closed Captioning Project.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I've been busy with college and stuff.
I've probably heard you, or I just don't even pay attention to the voicemail parts.
So I've heard you probably.
Probably while I'm asleep, because I'll fall asleep to Brad's stuff a lot.
That happens a lot.
A lot of people say that, that he's got a soothing voice.
Don't know how you feel about that, but a lot of people say that.
He's got a nice, soothing voice.
Yeah, I fall asleep masturbating to him, too.
Okay, cool.
With the Pokemon cards and all that shit.
Yeah, with the dust spots.
I'm getting full stuck in it.
All right, hold up. Let me call the wife. I just changed the ID to his how do I do this go here find a case II?
Find a case
Casey yeah, okay. He sounds like a tough guy. Jeez. I'd be so worried if I actually
Sounds like he's tall lanky though. I don't think he could
Just met please leave your message for he's trying to call from his cell phone
I don't know what's going to play gay as sex sounds just to make it sound like it's actually you know you know what the gays do you know what they'd be doing when they'd be having the sex
probably uh fucking some pokemon cards yeah getting all turned on by the pokemons so what's what's the pokemon card you mentioned i never i don't know that stuff
deathclobs deathclobs deathclobs yeah it's like this like skull thing oh shit scary
The Cyclops is cool.
Is it related to Puffins?
With a cape.
No, it's not.
I know like the old ones.
My favorite was Psyduck on the cartoon.
He was funny.
Oh, yeah.
Psyduck is funny.
Doesn't Psyduck have like a really, like he's shit until like he charges.
There's like one attack he does that's really good.
Is that correct?
Do you know?
I don't know if you've played the game.
Yeah, I've played the games, but I don't think so.
I can see his race.
Pretty cool.
All right.
Yeah.
Well, I'm going to clear the line.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Let's go ahead and do that plan I had where I was going to call the one gymnastics number from the other gymnastics number.
Excuse me.
I'm in the mood for something with sesame seeds in it.
And not like a bun.
Like a toasted sesame seed kind of candy kind of thing.
Or a pecan log.
I never had a pecan log.
I saw one reviewed on YouTube last week.
I was like, damn, that looks good.
I wish I could have that.
And then I was at a CVS and they had a pecan log right there on an end cap.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Caller ID is set, copying the next number to call, moving over to that PC, typing a 1, ctrl v, enter, and away we go.
You've reached California Gymnastics, we're sorry we missed your call.
Ah, damn you.
And we'll get back to you as soon as possible, thank you.
All that work for nothing.
I'm not going to call the gym that Dwight is at, are you crazy?
I don't attack or hurt my own kind, we're a family here.
Madhouse Live
I know it was really hard to get through because so many people were calling it.
And now I think everyone's like, ah, fuck that.
I'm going to sit there trying to call all fucking night.
Well, that was a good time.
Going back to the voicemails.
Yeah, they didn't even get a lot of voicemails this week.
I've got an obituary guy left a long one, so we'll play that in a little bit.
Hello, my name is Blonde.
I'm contacting you about the cards you have on Craigslist.
I feel guilty to the why you're giving them away.
However, found it funny that I kind of did the same thing years ago to my son.
If they're still available, I would love to give them to my son who is 23 now.
And I started collecting them again.
I can meet wherever you feel safe to do so or anytime you can do so.
Please let me know and thank you.
Okay, cool.
What a bitch.
Do that to her son.
Yeah, hi.
I had the Pokemon cards.
Oh, hi.
How you doing?
Good.
I'm good.
Like, I had a really gnarly bowel movement, but you're not interested in that.
I was calling about the Pokemon cards.
You wanted to maybe get these off of me?
My son's in big trouble.
I can tell.
You know what?
The funny thing is, is my son would tell you, uh-oh, that sounds like something my mom would
Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
All right. No problem. Can you just call me or text me when you're there? All right. It's going to take give me 10 minutes to get out there. All right. Okay. Sounds good. You text me. I'll call you. You text. We text and all that with me. I'll give you these cards. All right. Okay. Sounds good. All right. Thank you. Five, four, three, two, one.
I'm gonna take a break everyone there's a mouth line caller right now I apologize
I know I just put the call out for people to call in but I do have to take a break I had to
check on the dog possibly walk them and then I have to urinate myself and empty my bladder
I don't think I have to have a bowel movement I feel pretty good right back there right now
ever since I started losing the weight it just started you know coming right out doing really
Prank Call
Prank Call
Prank Call
MadhouseLive.com
Madhouse Radio
Madhouse Live
I said, yo, brother don't sway nice. He knows he's nice. You know what I'm saying?
So Chuck and God are filming. He's turning into a public enemy, man.
Now remember that line he was kicking to me on the way out to L.A., my home to Queens,
while he was in the car on the way to the shop?
Well, yo, right now, keep the bass for them brothers and let them know what goes on.
What goes on?
Well, we put it up on the floor and now we're back in the shop.
They were down at the beach, so yes, go down to the shop.
All right, everybody, we're back.
Madhouse Radio
Prank Call Enemy No. 1
I'm the host, Carlito
The king of prank calls
The inventor of prank calls
The inventor of the hold fail prank call
The inventor of the lunk alarm prank call
The inventor of calling conference lines
All that
That's me right here
There would be no prank call community
If it wasn't for me
Just saying
I want to say a big what's up to
First of all, LJ
Who donated a super chat
Madhouse Live
Prank Call Nation
Yeah, here's another person who says they're very interested in the collection of cards
Oh, wait, the lady's at the Walmart's. Oh shit. There's a mouth on a collar. Oh shit
Oh shit collar stay on the air
Yeah about the cards once you get them out of your ass, huh once you get the cards out of your ass
Yeah, get them out of your asshole. Oh, yeah. Well, it's stupid. That was a waste
I could have had her walk around Walmart collar. You're you're on the air identify yourself
So, I command it.
Caller?
Alright, caller!
Yeah, you're stupid.
Waste of fucking time.
Wasting my time, caller.
Whoa.
Hang on, I didn't send in the Skype.
Holy shit.
So, we've got a little less than one hour left to show machine.
Really quick, it's a long one, but let's play Obituary Man's Obituary for the week.
It's some white guy who made music that died.
So, I don't know who they are, and I don't got a song of theirs to play,
I don't listen to that white cracker music.
That white devil cracker.
No, you guys are alright.
I like you guys.
Just waiting on Google Voice to load up.
Un momento.
Here we go.
Uh, right?
Are we gonna go?
Actually, there are a few calls here.
I think we're having trouble with the incoming line again.
Here's the voiceman.
Brett, turn it up.
It's still buffering.
That's why.
Alright.
And we sit and wait.
And we hear nothing.
Yay!
Yay!
I can play it over here because Milkman isn't on the air, so there's no need for me to have to play it over there.
Just fuck him.
No, no, no.
Oh, I don't know, man.
I just don't think I should be the one to have to apologize to the guy for being rude and mean and nasty to me five minutes before the show started.
We talked about this last week, and I know I probably shouldn't be bringing it up, but people keep asking me.
Fall Fun Drive.
Contribute $100, and we'll ship you a Jazz Groove coffee mug, tote bag, or CD of your choice.
For how much?
And you'll also get a one-year subscription.
Get the fuck out of here.
Kevin Michael Allen
Born Jesus Christ Allen
Died June 28, 1993
Gigi Allen was an American singer, songwriter, and record producer
Who performed and recorded with many groups during his career
G.G. Allen was best known for his outlandish live performances, which often featured transgressive acts, including coprophobia, self-mutilation, and attacking audience members, for which he was arrested and imprisoned on multiple occasions.
All music and G4 TV's That's Tough have called him the most spectacular degenerate in rock and roll history, and the toughest rock star in the world, respectively.
Gigi Allen's last show was on June 27th, 1993 at a small club called The Gas Station, a punk venue located inside of a former gas station at 194 East 2nd Street in Manhattan.
During the second song, the venue cut the power, after which he trashed the club, walked across the street naked, and then continued on, not wearing shorts but still covered in blood and feces, through the neighborhood, followed by a large group of fans.
Closed Captions by GetTranscribed.com
Call people I'm sorry if you're trying to call the mouth fine again that's 405-396-6884
it does not seem to be ringing properly today and for that I apologize I'm sorry hey Matt you there
can you hear me I think I'm having trouble with the audio on this oh hang on Maddie it might be
my fault dude oh yeah duh I got it hey Matt you should be on now I had the wrong slider slid
What's up?
Whee!
Yay, Matt!
This is when Matt takes it away.
All right, Matt, I'm going to hang up.
Call back.
Let me check the audio over there again.
Dude, I hate nicotine withdrawal so much.
Out of all the drugs that I've fucking done, nicotine stands alone at being the biggest pain in the fucking ass.
They say it's harder to get off than heroin, so that just tells you.
And they're fucking expensive.
Dude, Milkman, I swear to God, never, ever, ever, dude.
Wubbuffet
Wubbuffet
Wubbuffet
Wubbuffet
Nick Hattie
it's socially acceptable I think that's probably part of it
it just makes you oh god it just sucks I'm on day three you guys
I'm getting there good luck I'm getting there I'm on day three cool shut up
hey caller you're on there hey it's Brad hey bear Connor what's up
yeah oh you know I'm playing some GTA you still playing that into your show
Madhouse Live
Hey Matt
You know what I'm saying
We'll get Matt on it
Because he loves trains
You know
He's a big fan of the trains
Yeah
We'll do hype
Yeah
Yeah
So I'm kind of excited
I'm going to pick it up
I'm playing God of War again
I started playing it again
I don't know if you played that
You're a Playstation guy right
You're a Playstation home
Um
No
I'm a nothing
Like I have a Playstation 3
And an Xbox 360
Oh
Okay
Yeah
No I don't have systems
I just have my Steam
Oh
I just play GTA
I don't think Red Dead Redemption is going to come out on PC for a while, probably.
I don't know.
I guess I'm not playing then.
I guess not, unless you get a PlayStation 4, but you ain't going to do that.
Nah, probably not.
Any news to talk about? Anything you want to bring up?
Nope, nothing.
The person whom you're trying to reach is currently unavailable.
Who do you call?
I was trying to call Matt, because I tried to call him earlier and there was silence.
I'm going to try him one more time.
He called back and left a voicemail.
Try him again here.
And yeah, and then Prank Calls.
I got a sushi bar.
Can you do a sushi bar?
Do you have any idea for that?
I'm trying not to.
I'm going to call him a madarchod.
Okay.
The person whom you're trying to reach is currently unavailable.
Matt's currently unavailable.
Maybe a bhenchod also.
All right.
Well, you know, it's Japanese, but you never know.
You can say like kakasuki.
I don't know.
It's good to have your attention.
This is Stanley Howard.
Hello, kakasuki.
Suki, I would like to make an order, please.
Uh, sure. Hello, yes?
Hello, Kaga Suki, I'd like to make an order.
Uh, we normally don't take orders over the phone, sir.
Ah, fuck.
Why not?
I'm actually calling from the corporate office with the city.
Okay.
And we're having a small problem here. I need you to go to the back room.
Okay. Uh, give me one second.
With the electricity. Sure, okay.
Sure, give me one second.
Okay.
I don't know what I'm doing
I never called a Chinese restaurant
I don't know what
I don't know what
Some bullshit I made up
Like machine
I don't know what to say
I don't know what to say
I don't want to throw the number away
Because poor Parkman
Oh I'm messing up a Parkman number
I'm sorry Parkman
He told me that
If you don't want to do my numbers
Just skip them
We'll give it a few more, uh, another minute here, and then we'll move on.
He used to send me numbers, and I would take, like, you know, like eight months to do them,
or I would just kind of not do them.
I suck at doing requests.
But not you.
Nope, I'm the best.
Ah, we'll call a golf place, because I ain't waiting for this.
Hey, let's do the thing.
Topgolf Las Vegas
Please make your selections from the following options
For location and hours of operation
I'm sorry, that is not a valid response. Please try again. Thank you for calling. I'm sorry, that is not a valid response. Please try again.
Hey, Roy McBacon is calling me a gay in the chat room. Can you tell her to not do that?
Our associates are busy assisting other guests at this time. Please hold, and your call will be transferred to the next available associate.
Not cool.
Thank you, and we look forward to seeing you at Topgolf.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I needed to let you know we're going to be doing an overnight treatment tonight on your property there.
We've got seven trucks ready, and we're going to be there probably in about two hours.
I'm at a call center at our home office in Dallas.
Let me try to get a call center in there at the venue.
Okay.
Yeah, that'd be great.
I just need to let them know.
Okay.
Thanks.
Carrie, a girl's name?
I don't know if you said Gary or Carrie.
It could go either way.
I'm eating reheated pasta roni.
Pasta roni?
Is it like rice-a-roni for hot?
Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
and this is the last number that dialed it.
You found it in the bathroom.
Because I sent this guy to the Walmart
and he was going to the bathroom looking for me.
He couldn't find me.
I don't know if you heard this before.
Yeah, I've been listening the whole time.
Was this the first guy?
Yeah, well, this is the guy that I sent
that was looking for me in the bathroom.
Yeah, it's the first guy.
First guy.
All right, here we go.
See if he answers.
Homer, what's up, dude?
Now you want to go outside?
Fucking dog.
He's got to wait.
Did you have trouble calling in?
The Project 5 subscriber you have called is not available.
Project 5?
Oh, we got an FU button there.
Hey, before I went down to make dinner, I parked my DeLorean on this roof on a building in GTA.
Uh-huh.
And I just noticed that somebody used a machine gun to draw a couple of cactuses into the wall.
Oh, nice.
Up here on the roof.
Oh, that's cool.
It's a friend.
Yeah.
That's cool.
Yeah, like an octopus guy is online.
He's a PLA person, so I guess he did that.
I just noticed it.
That's cool.
It's very cute.
So you can fly the DeLorean and everything?
I haven't even seen it in use.
I know you got one
I saw a post of yours
where you got it
put missiles on it too
oh nice
the game is getting
a little long on the tooth though
yeah I'd like to
move to something else
I just want it to be online
I like online stuff
yeah
the last I heard about GTA 6
is it was going to be
like set in a
Tokyo like city
I don't know if that's
still the case
that'd be cool
I just wish they'd
expand this one
you know let us go
to the next town over
or something
yeah
please leave your message
crap
maybe like Vice City
again might be cool
it's been a while
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Hi, this is the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and Transgender National Hotline.
We are a non-profit peer-counseling hotline.
Please hold while we try to connect your call.
Are you talking on this one?
We both do.
I'll start it out.
As long as I get to be your partner.
Of course.
Sorry, our volunteers are currently busy talking with other calls.
Damn it, man.
Please try calling us back in a few minutes.
You may also visit us...
No, that's not convenient, and I'm not going to do it.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Top Quality High
That's what I'm looking for
Thank you for calling Plexiderm Skin Care
This call may be recorded for quality assurance
My name is Shannon
May I have your first name?
My name is Cross
I may also have you some code
32808
So just take me a moment to pull up the promotion here in my system
Are you calling looking to erase the bags under your eyes today?
Well, they're under my balls
Well, sir, I'm going to be releasing the call
No, no, no, no, release me down there
Matt Hellock
Matt Hellock
Matt Hellock
Hey, buddy.
Thank you for calling Flexiderm Skincare.
My name is John O'Neill, and this call is being recorded for quality assurance.
Fuck you.
May I have your first name, please?
Yeah, hey, my name is Cross, and I'm on the line with Matt fucking Hillock.
Hey, dummy.
Hi, uh, excuse me?
Are you calling for Flexiderm Skincare?
Yeah, yeah, his name is Cross, and he's calling with me, Matt fucking Hillock.
Hello.
How are you?
Hello.
Hey, um, my name is John O'Neill, and this call is being recorded for quality assurance.
Thanks for calling Plexiderm Skincare and may I have your first name?
We just went through that twice. His name is Cross and I'm Matt. We just did that before you asked again.
Okay. I'm having a little trouble understanding you so I'm just making sure that I've got it right, sir.
Okay, so what do you think the names are then, genius?
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
No, no, no, no.
We assure you, I swear to God, this is not a prank call.
I swear to God.
It is not a prank call, sir.
It is absolutely not a prank call.
I wouldn't go lying on Jesus' name, yo.
All right, sir.
Well, I do apologize.
Tell us, buddy.
Yeah, tell us, how does it work?
Does it have silver in it?
The whole time, it's like, who's on the line?
Billy, Big Billy.
Yeah, this is Billy.
Hey, how you doing, Billy?
What's up?
Are you a racist?
How you doing?
Are you doing?
No, I'm alright, guys. How you doing?
Oh, okay. You're alright. Good. We're good. Yeah, we're just here doing prank calls, you know?
Yeah.
Thanks for calling.
I only try to fucking call in 30 times, motherfucker. You don't answer your phone.
It's a busy fucking thing. Is this Billy from back in the dialer days or is this a different Billy?
No, this is the Doob Tube, actually.
Alright, the Doob Tube. Nice.
Thanks for calling. I'm Jonathan Greenhut.
I like the strange things tunes.
Hello?
Hello?
Thank you for calling Flex Center Skin Care.
My name is Eric Centino, and this call is being recorded for quality assurance.
May I have your first name?
Well, Billy is the one who's calling in.
He's very interested in the skin cream.
He has very tight skin.
Okay.
Hello?
Well, hello.
Hi.
Yeah, my name is Billy.
Can I help you?
Billy?
Okay.
Give me one second, sir.
Okay.
Great.
I will just pull up my promotions in my system, sir.
uh... may i ask what type of problem do you have with your skin sir
it's all itchy
it's real itchy
ok sir do you have
do you have wrinkles or lines sir
what
do you have wrinkles or lines sir
wrinkles yeah
all over my bottom area and the tip and the tip
ok sir i completely understand
i hope you do sonny
ok sir
will this lubricate
ok sir you definitely called it the right place as you saw it's a very exciting
Closed Captioning by The Closed Captioning Project
I need a gosh darn discount.
Do you put it in your ass?
Hello, sir, please?
Please.
Please.
Tell us if you put it in your ass.
Stick it in.
It's not what it's made for, but he in fact does.
Because he's a rule breaker.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I've heard about that.
So I'm thinking that's just bottles of that, remarks of $59.
That would be an amazing fucking thing.
Hello?
Thank you for calling Black Skin and Skin Care.
My name is Eric.
How can I help you?
Yeah, is this for bags?
Is this for the bags?
Yes, sir.
I'm going to repeat for you.
Please do not call again, sir, if you're trying to make fun of us.
My bag of balls.
It has two balls in it.
Yes, sir.
The skin is very tight.
Thank you so much for your time today.
Have a great day.
How big are your balls?
I think it's not supposed to be tight.
The skin is supposed to be very loose, hence the wrinkles.
So you need whatever this cream is because when something's tight, it's not folding and wrinkly.
So you need to get your sack back to the way it used to be.
Nice and smooth.
Thank you for calling.
Yeah.
You know.
Call me for quality insurance.
Closed Captioning by The Closed Captioning Project.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
6-6-0-6-0-6
Yeah, he's stupid.
That's why he's doing this job
working in a makeup place or whatever
so we can get the dog
fucking straight up.
Yeah, isn't this a woman's job?
Why are you selling makeup?
It's 6-0-6-0-6
He's trying his best, baby.
You're pissing me off
and your phone is shit.
Are you at home?
Are you working from home?
Oh, if so,
are you in the lingerie
by any chance?
Oh, definitely.
It will just make a call
Call Nation Madhouse Live
Closed Captioning by The Closed Captioning Project.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
We don't take on every client, but we do take on select ones, and Flixiterm seems like one.
Quality, not quantity, motherfucker, you.
Or get out of here, bags, as we like to call it.
All right, I'm going to let you go.
My dog's whining, all right?
Have a wonderful rest of your night.
It's because you shaved that goddamn dog.
He's cold.
Go buck yourself.
The fucking dog is cold, man.
What do you expect?
Shit.
I think I'm going to hang it up, to be honest with you.
It's 945.
It's close enough.
Thanks Matt
Thanks for having me around
Sorry I wasn't there for the first thing
But like I said I had a piss pants situation
You're being grumpy
I'll grumpy you
Alright see you later Matt
Bye
Bye Billy
Alright buddy thanks for calling
That's Big Billy
But you know what I think a
A lot of angry voicemails
I don't know what's going on here
Hi Caller, you're on the air, really quick, really quick. What's up?
Hey, Dwight McClanaghy Hanks. How you doing?
Hey, hey, hey, what's going on?
You thought I wouldn't know who you were, motherfucker, you? Yeah.
No, I left you like six voicemails, but it just sounds just like the...
Oh, I saw the me, me, me one came through, like it flashed up. It translated that. The other ones say no translation available.
Yeah, that's just because I was sitting there for like 30 seconds.
Homer J.
Jay
What are you doing?
I'm calling about Pokemon cards here
Please leave your message for Natalie
Her number's busy, I guess
Homer, what is it, dude?
Like, just give me ten minutes, man
You don't need to go out that bad
You've been in the bathroom
Homer, shit on the carpet
I fed him an Arby's chicken slurter
Hi, you got a hold of me regarding the Pokemon cards?
Yeah
Okay
Do you have any plans for the cards?
Are you going to play with them?
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I caught him sitting on the toilet peeing, and I told him that's not allowed in this house, so he's getting all his...
He's been warned several times about that.
You see?
All right.
I go pee, I sit down, and I touch my wee-wee, and I go, wee-wee, wee-wee.
Your kids aren't... Your family isn't going to, like, masturbate looking at these cards, are they?
What?
Is your family, they're not going to like masturbate and look at the cards when they
masturbate?
No.
No.
Okay.
Cause that's what he does.
That's what my son does.
He masturbates when he looks at the cards.
He gets real like excited.
He likes Japanese things.
Is this a real post or is this a joke?
No, this is real.
I need to get rid of these cards.
I was hoping you could meet me at the Walmarts in Florin, on Florin, you know where that
is?
Um, how many cards is it?
Oh, it's like a hundred something.
I don't give these shits to Mexicans, so forget it.
I don't give this to Mexicans, you people.
Whatever.
You guys are weirdos.
Fuck that, you guys are weirdos.
Oh, man.
I'll call him back.
I gotta go. I gotta go shower. I stink.
Yeah, go take a shower. I'm gonna hang up the show, alright? It's over.
Hang the fuck up. The show's canceled.
Get out of here. Get out of here.
I'm out of Park Bend numbers.
Homer wants to get out of here.
No one else is called in for Pokemon cards.
I think we're gonna wrap it up.
I'm gonna have to pass on voicemails this week,
so if you left a funny one, I will play it next week at the beginning of the show machine.
But for now, that's it.
I wanna thank everyone who called in
people who sent in numbers LeonTex sent
numbers in but I didn't get to them I'm sorry bro
sorry LeonTex
I'll save them if they're still good next week
or if I do something later on I'll hit them up
thank you for the effort I much
appreciate everyone who sends me numbers if I forget
them don't take it to heart man it's hard to
manage all this shit during a show shut
up faggot so okay
I don't say that word all the time I'm sorry
I don't really I don't say the F word sorry
oh my god I'm gonna get so me too'd
Um, I really don't. I'm not homophobic, guys.
Anyway, madhouselive.com. Check all the links over there.
YouTube is in full effect. Madhouse Radio on YouTube.
Follow me on social media. The links are at madhouselive.com.
Support the show on Patreon.
And also, speaking of supporting, I did have some more YouTube...
I did have some more YouTube contributions. Let me shout those out real quick.
I really feel bad for saying that word. I'm sorry. I'll edit it out. Don't worry.
Beaver Believer for Life
Veterans Day November 11th
Please do another Entitled Veterans Show
Yeah, yeah, actually, yeah
The Veterans Day show where I just call up as a veteran
and act real entitled about all the free shit
you can get as a veteran
Very, uh, that's a good idea
When is November 11th? Is that coming up?
One, two, about two weeks
It's on a Monday, I should have that day off of work
So yeah, fuck that, we'll do it
Yeah, I'll do another Veterans Day show
Thanks for letting me know about that, I'll mark it down
I'm Mark it down
Alright
I'm done
Thanks for tuning in everyone
We'll have another show next week
Maybe Milkman will be on
If he calls and apologizes
And grovels
And pays me money
Mushroom sauce
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