Spicy Hot Lamby Nipple Chops

14 Jun 2019 · 1 h 37 min · 8,591 words · source

Calls (12, 48 min of 1 h 37 min)

  1. Nordstrom Rack store asked about smell live 1.1 min clip ↓
  2. GNC asked about fake pee ivr 48 s clip ↓
  3. GNC asked about drug test supplies live 2.8 min clip ↓
  4. Bath and Body Works asked about lotion side effects live 6.3 min clip ↓
  5. Calling Coinstar for diesel fuel live 3.1 min clip ↓
  6. Apple Support wife's phone hack attempt live 7.1 min clip ↓
  7. Ivy Educational Services caller live 1.6 min clip ↓
  8. Korean restaurant ordered lamby nipple chops live 1.3 min clip ↓
  9. Korean restaurant ordered lamby nipple chops again live 2.3 min clip ↓
  10. Korean restaurant asked about panda bear live 1.3 min clip ↓
  11. Burger King drive-thru sandwich cut request live 5.8 min clip ↓
  12. 7-Eleven Honolulu asked about diet Coke recall live 15.1 min clip ↓

Transcript

I'm in the streets listening to Madhouse Live I hope my speech can compete with that
bad mouth style that we get from Carlito that's my big amigo so just kick back to listen to
this cat call people when this show goes live I be like damn this shit's bitchin' stop
whatever I'm doing to tune in and listen you can catch me in the back of his home at Horse
Machine Ranch Road I'm bustin' mad fat flows for assholes and banchos my spit crazy shout
out to Big Amy that's nice honey baby we kissin' pussies so ladies set your labia it's crazy
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
This is a great show already Mixler won't broadcast and I'm dropping stuff and disconnecting
cables I don't have Homer to blame tonight just my own fat ass how about a little peach
fuzz it's been a while since I played this one this might help out all right take a look
Look over here, see if I can get Mixler to work yet.
It looks like Mixler is working now.
Alright, good. We're on Mixler now. Excellent.
I hope it sticks to working. It's been a piece of shit.
Now I have it playing in the ground.
Anything else?
I think I just have way too much on my desk is what the problem is.
I just have way too much shit on my desk.
Hope you all are having a good weekend so far.
Starting, I'm getting dragged to a gay wedding tomorrow. A gay wedding.
I'm sorry. The person you are trying to reach has a voicemail box that has not been set up yet
Please try your call again. Later. Goodbye a wedding tomorrow boy
Kiss and all that stuff at the wedding wouldn't ask if anyone has anything to say or hold their peace
I said marriage between a man and a woman will be real ignorant
I know we're spenders just to say that marriage is between a man and a woman
The
So I don't have to stay there embarrassed my wife
Start quoting pastor Martin Semper. I've done some research
I've done some research about what these homosexuals do in the house. Good morning, everyone. My name is pastor. Dr. Martin Semper
This is what I'll do if anyone should have anything it's this marriage speak now forever
Hold your peace and I'll stand up and say this good morning. Everyone. My name is pastor. Dr. Martin Semper
I'm here in the capacity as the chairman of the National Task Force Against Homosexuality in Uganda.
We are making legislation to make sure that sodomy and homosexuality never sees the light of legality in this land of the Pearl of Africa.
Taking time to do a little research to know what homosexuals do in the privacy of their bedroom.
One of the thing they do is called a no leaking where they a man's anus is he leaked like this?
by the other person
Like ice cream and then what happens even poo poo comes out the other poo poo is outer and then they eat the poo poo
The other one they do is they have a sex practice called fisting where they insert their hand
Laugh Track Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
trance
logan
except the eating it
scotland
but not just
we do not want the sickness this is sick and it's there for the beyond we do not
want to
Now they start off by touching each other's genitals and smelling each other
then this one smears the poop all over the other person's face as if that is
not enough he puts the hand deeper as Africans we want to ask Barack Obama to
explain to us is this what he wants to bring to Africa as a human right to eat
Yeah that'll be me at that wedding tomorrow yeah sorry YouTube you didn't
get to hear that just look up pastor Martin Semper that's with two s's SS
EMP a you've probably heard it before if you're cool like me we've played that
before on the show several years ago Jen Stewart thought it was hilarious
match if I stood up a little of a gay wedding and said that's the same shit
I'll take chocolate ice cream to the wedding where do my numbers let's go I apologize folks
I'll be right here though where else am I gonna go right uh it's called Nordstrom rack
super phone brothers cracking me up today calling a store that smells really good in the mall as
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The
the
well we do have plus five options for women yes
by me she's not really that real that
you know arm I don't but like we go up
for women plus I could go up to believe 3 XL
now how many pounds you think they did how many pounds think that is
I'm not sure how many pieces how many pieces
Pounds Baby Pounds
I don't know
we don't base our clothes off of pounds
either you can fit it or you really
can't fit it
you're more than welcome to come in and see
like what we have is something that you're
looking for but off the top of my head
she had a panic attack cause someone
ate the can of frosting that she had bought
and she ripped her clothes
and now she needs something
for the wedding tomorrow we're going to a homosexual
wedding tomorrow
tikka masala papadum Carlito Laugh Track
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank
Laugh Track
Laugh Track
Laugh Track
In case of a fast pick up
We ask you to let us know that you're not a voicemail system
So you need to press 1 to take this call
Oh hey
Hello caller you're on the air
Hello Carlitos
Hey Dad, how are you?
Hey, como andas?
What's up, Dad? How you been?
I've been very well, very well. How are you, boy?
Alright, motherfucker, you?
Happy Father's Day. It's coming up. I'm not getting you nothing.
Hijo de tu pinche de puta madre, maricón, cabrón de mierda.
Ay, que este pendejo, pinche pendejo, wey, pero wey, pinche culo.
Uh, yeah, alright.
Culero.
I'm calling GNC if you're ready.
Is that D the B?
Hey, which beaner are you? Do I know you? No, I think I'm a second-time caller
Hey, how you doing? Do you have pills for skin problems? Hello? Hello?
Do you have supplements for skin problems?
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I was probably looking up first to make sure that I was saying cow semen cow semen oh yeah uh do you have the stuff for the drug test do you have the stuff for the drug test um we just have like cleansers and stuff don't really have anything so bad what what do I do with it um they just have a lot of different ones they have no problem do I put it in the pee no it's not that type you pretty it's just a cleanser to just like
not to just help clean out any impurities or like anything that they have
oh you guys don't have the fake pee?
oh no this is DNC
what about you do you have clean pee?
oh me?
yeah
yeah
you do drugs?
you hook us up with it some?
as long as you're not pregnant we don't want it to come up that we're pregnant
yeah
this is for brad
this is for our friend brad
I already fucked up once
this is for our friend brad
he's a drug addict
he's got a piss test he's on parole
probation rather whatever the difference is
We don't have any for pee test. I'm so sorry. I feel bad.
But I'll bring in a cup and you can pee in it for us.
You're trying to steal cow semen.
Oh my goodness.
I'll break you off some bread.
See, I wish I could get some bread, but I can't do that. I'm on the clock. I'm so sorry.
20 bucks a gallon.
Seriously, come on.
The most I can suggest is pretty much just looking online. I can't really tell you guys.
You can pee for us. If you have clean pee, it's hard to find someone with clean pee, you know.
Is it really that hard to talk about your pee?
I would, honestly I would suggest not using it on your pee
I would just use the fake pee like you guys did
Alright
Well I mean like you sound cute
I mean you sound pretty cute
You sound like you have sexy pee
What do you do for fun?
You guys are so funny I don't work
You sound like you have sexy pee
I know it probably sparkles
My pee probably sparkles you guys are funny
But thank you
Alright
And I hope I answered all you guys' questions
You like bath and body works?
You sound like a warm vanilla kinda girl.
Mmm she does!
Do you like sweet pea?
How about champagne toasts person?
Laugh Track Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
How you know I was here yesterday cuz you sound the exact same I talked to you for a little bit you don't remember
Is your hair real?
I
Saw my name. My name is Carlos
Mm-hmm asked you out on a date and you were like super not down
You like rubbed my arm and I like got really really turned on a little bit like whatever
I gotta close you guys. I'm sorry. It was fun talking to you guys. All right, get the hell out of here. See ya
Look she's not gonna pee for us
We're gonna leave we need clean
We clean urine in our face, yeah, hi, hi, we have a drug test coming up
Do you have clean pee?
BATH AND BODY
PLEASE
I'm sorry my friend is off to the horrible start. Do you do methamphetamine? Oh, my bad
Who's this?
Same place
BATH AND BODY
Yeah
Hi, thank you for calling Bath and Body or Space Street. How can I help you?
is this the store in the mall that smells good?
May I ask who's calling?
Carlos
Yes
This is the store that smells good
Yes
We have all the... um... the lotions and stuff
Yes we do
Okay, now you're in a biotic it has alcohol in it, right?
You have hand sanitizer
Yes
Because I want to drink them can we get drunk off the hand sanitizer can you actually get drunk on hand sanitizer?
Yeah
You know they were doing that in prisons and they took all the hand sanitizer out of the kitchens because people were drinking it
You have to drink the prisoners were taking the pouches of hand sanitizer out of the kitchens and drinking them how much you have to drink
Yeah, like a buzz
It makes you really sick you get a buzz, but but I'm drunk. Oh, it's gotta be pretty strong
Let me see. I got one here. How many?
How many pumps yeah ninety nine point nine nine percent germs trying to see how much alcohol
I don't know what percentage alcohol is, but I imagine you have serving sizes
I got to drink pruno than freaking sanitizer though
I don't know
That yeasty pruno
That's not even a toss up
Fermented fruit
That's nasty like old rotten fruit
I think I'd be doing the Purell
I don't know
I don't know if I'd do the sanitizer
I don't know that I'd do the pruno
I think you're coming right
I think I'm kind of thinking that Bruno's going to taste kind of fruity when in reality it's not going to taste fruity at all.
I imagine it just smells like spoiled, like I've smelled like spoiled apple juice before and it's like a yeasty kind of, ugh.
Like a chemically?
Not even, I don't know, like a bad beer, kind of.
Okay, yeah, I get what you're saying, I get what you're saying.
Are we still on hold here for this bitch?
No, no, we're alright, she hung up, yeah, like bad pussy is what it smells like.
Got a white front to back ladies guys too you don't want your balls to smell thank you for calling back and bodywork
Please wait while I transfer your call. Thank you for calling math and bodyrico I sitting on my help you this is Isis
Yes, whoa whoa whoa take it easy right?
a
as they came out with that name they took away that
name for you know think it away from me cuz I was born before they
back do you have trouble does it when you fly do you
if you do I don't know if you're cool like if you get to fly
you having trouble at TSA I haven't not a single ounce of trouble
really there are like hmm no screening and another pic couple fingers in you
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I've got a peach.
I don't recommend it.
You could probably die.
It's a big one.
It's called Peach Bellini, it says.
Uh-huh.
Yeah, and we want to drink it.
You know, we're going to take shots of it.
I don't think you should.
I don't recommend that at all.
Well, we really, it's Friday night.
We're trying to get drunk, but we're not allowed to buy beer and stuff.
You know, we're only 20 years old.
Okay.
We go to Berkeley.
All right.
I got to go.
Well, you got to go.
Come on, honey.
Good luck.
Don't drink hand sanitizer, please.
Too late, too late, too late, too late, too late, too late, too late, too late, oh my god, okay, bye, oh man, shit, I kept you on hold, I was wondering why you weren't jumping in, shit, I, I was, the music was so loud, I was like, what's going on, that was my fault, fuck, don't worry, how does your labia sound, sound alright, nice and floppy, oh, I'll call her back, nice and floppers, call her back, nice big pair of floppers, wear it like a helmet, thank you for calling Bath and Body Works, this is Kevin, how may I help you, um, well, yeah, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is,
Jonathan and I was wondering um, who do I speak to if I I put on some of you guys's lotions and I began getting a
little crusty
um some area I
See, I think it would be
Customer service. Let me put you on a brief hold. Okay. Okay. Thank you so much
I think we're called in the same mall area do what are these like all in the same vicinity of each other?
Are you just blasting them out? They're all in Sanford. It's right now. They're in San Francisco
We're calling Fred by the Musconi Center. Oh
Did we do some tech San Francisco girls? Let's go any Center? That's where the the
The Macintosh was first unveiled by Steve Jobs in 1984
We call Ross
So the Marshalls, it's like the same fucking disgusting this especially the gene section it's like
Yeah, that's the type of place where you get dragons on the back of your jeans
Called them a while ago, and I don't know if you guys remember you guys called me
I said my name was bailo and you guys called me gay
Like I was like, hey, my name's bailo and you guys are like Gabriel you're gay
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I was helping him apply some thinking that it would be fine
you know what that kind of I don't know why it reminds me I had a girlfriend and
we were gifted a like a you know intimacy package kind of thing okay gift gift basket thing
and in there was an edible like a sexual type one yeah and there was a there was a container of
Edible Strawberry Edible
Loof
Panties
No not the
Panties
Oh Loof
And I was like hell yeah
And I opened it up
And I squeaked
I filled it in my mouth
Like it was like
Easy cheese
Like it was like
Like
Like it was like
Whipped cream or something
And I was like
Yeah
I was like oh
No it's not
Like it's lickable
But you don't want to
Eat it like candy
It's
Yeah
She's like
God you're so
Fucking stupid
Look at this
It's like it was
Edible
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
Call Ross Barney's New York San Francisco
I'm trying to find you guys I'm running out of fuel
We're so low!
Huh?
We're here on 800 at Market.
Alright, well I'm coming down Market, but I don't see any gas pumps anywhere.
I need diesel.
Carlos, the light is on!
Hurry!
Alright, we got the company, man.
Where do I find you guys?
Where on Market are you?
We're at Coinstar.
Yeah, on 800 Market.
We're at Coinstar.
Yeah.
Coinstar?
Yeah, we're at Coinstar.
Okay, yeah, but this is diesel though, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, I told, I told the Google Assistant to take us to Coinstar.
How much do you guys charge a gallon?
You don't sell gallons here.
Leader?
Do you have it by the leader?
This is America, do you have it by the leader?
Alright, here we go.
Woah!
Woah!
Woah!
Woah!
Woah!
Woah!
Woah!
Woah!
Woah!
Woah!
Woah!
Woah!
Woah!
Woah!
Yes, yeah, we just got in a car accident trying to find your stupid place
Yeah, the guy just said turn left here he said here here here here and I left and I got into an accident
I need your insurance information. You made me get an accident. You guys have all state now
We need two years of diesel stat. I just find the right diesel because this is a quote a clothing brand
Well, we needed diesel fuel and then the iPhone said that this was diesel
Yeah this is Diesel
but we're in Diesel
clothing store
there's two different
Diesel clothes
Yeah is there a man
we can talk to
cause you don't understand
Diesel's a fuel honey
it makes the car go
no I
no I know
what Diesel fuel is
I know what a fuel is
do you know what a fuel is
do you know how it goes
the car thinks it's yummy
the car goes
mmm
drinks the fuel
and it goes
that's how your boyfriend
takes you out on dates
oh thank you
I'm a lesbian though
Call Nation Madhouse Live
The Spice and the Wires
Call ended was the 15 minute thing again. There's a thing where after 15 minutes. It'll disconnect people for some reason
I think it's trying to do it again. Sorry Dom try to call back in
405 396 684 is a number to call in that hello
Hey P Falcon, how you doing P?
Okay, well that's not so funny yeah anything for that all right, how you doing buddy?
Pretty good, pretty good. Thanks for asking.
Good.
Yeah.
No problem.
Hey, I've been wanting to ask where that sound bite comes from where the guy says asshole in that really funny way.
Asshole. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I can tell you.
Asshole.
That's from a movie called Tunnel Vision. It's from a movie called Tunnel Vision from the early 80s.
Oh, okay.
It's kind of hard to explain.
Tunnel Vision
Jimmy John's Closed
What about that other soundbite of the guy saying bhenchod?
Oh, bhenchod? That's a Jim Stewart prank call.
BANNACHOD
Yeah, that was the guy was calling him banchod. That's where that's from.
Yeah, I'd love to do a prank with you.
Well, we got someone to pick up. Let's see.
Mensho Tokyo
Small cafe with ramen noodles.
Alright, ramen.
Who are we trying to call?
Uh, Japanese restaurant.
I feel like I might know some Japanese bad words.
I think the worst...
Oh, shine, I think.
And manko means pussy, I think.
I know Sekusu is sex. Sekusu. Sekusu me? Sex. Oh. Sekusu. Nice. My um. I learned today that the German company that owns Keurig and Krispy Kreme they were into some Nazi shenanigans back in the day. Oh. Forced labor and such. That's not good. Back in the 40s.
Your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice message system
six zero nine one five zero two three three is not available
It's the article the article
These companies like German companies when they start getting big and go international
They end up having to come to terms and do and get like historical research done and come clean and be transparent about
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
The Apple News App
The new and improved Apple News App
638
Is it over in Hawaii?
I think they're a 5 hour difference
It's like 6pm
It's a 6pm right now maybe
Yeah, they may answer
They should, yeah but in Guam
I thought you weren't going to answer
What's this Guam attitude
Where you don't want to answer the phone
After a long time
I'm noticing
We're busy sir
Oh yeah right, you're busy
I need help with my wife's phone.
Let me transfer you to service.
Is it a wireless phone?
Yeah, we want to crack the phone password.
Because I think she's having an affair with the army, the sergeant on the army base.
Who is this?
My name is Captain Cross.
Okay, let me transfer you to service.
Alright, you burnt pineapple.
What's the plan for this one?
It could be your brother or something, I don't know.
Can I go back to service and help you?
Yeah, I'm trying to get into my wife's cell phone because I think she's cheating on me with someone on the base
Do you understand this the severity of this shit?
Yeah, all right, so I want to hack it to her phone. Do you have the tools to do that?
It's an iPhone 5s. Yeah, actually might be able to get into it
Okay, we can get all the pictures and all the text messages
Yeah, do you know her password or do you want to bypass that as well? We need to bypass. I don't know what that is
The pin code no, I don't know what it is. She doesn't let me know like I like she's sitting there
I know she's texting and then she starts laughing like he he and I said what's so funny
Let me see. She's like no no no she pulls the phone away from me real fast. You know, yeah, okay
Let me okay one second. Let me let me give you to attack that actually
Well hurry up
Yeah, I can be your, like, anchor manager or something.
How you doing there, boss?
Doing all right.
We're looking for someone to hack into my wife's iPhone.
Yeah, we don't really do that.
Well, the guy I was talking to before said he could do it to a 5S.
He's all ready to do it.
What's your problem?
Maybe you can.
Maybe you're stupid.
I don't know.
Yeah, this is his lawyer.
It's actually okay for you guys to do that legally.
It's his wife.
He legally has the right to hack into his phone.
Yeah, tell me how to hack the phone just tell me and I'll do it.
Cmon, whatever it costs.
Shit, you know when I dropped stuff, I dropped a cup of juice and it got on top of my camera
Camera USB shit, so the cameras are offline. I hope I didn't fucking fried the webcam
So if you're watching on YouTube you can't show me they can hear the pranks, but you can't see me
I'm trying to fix it. I don't know what yeah
Yeah, I was like frozen on your face like yeah, I just know
It happened right as I look down
TheFNDC.com
Is that what you go by, like on PS Network or whatever?
Nah, just my name.
Just what I go by when I call Roy and stuff, you know?
Oh, all right.
All right, Big T.
All right, buddy.
All right, you should call some kanakas.
Here's the answer.
All right, Hawaii.
Yeah, sure, you got it.
Yeah.
Yeah, see you, buddy.
All right.
Bye.
See ya.
Bye.
Bye.
Goddamn fucking microphone.
Why do they keep saying that?
Damn cameras.
Madhouse Live
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I'm so excited for that. I was like hell yeah cheezits. Alright well I will continue to broadcast on YouTube without video of me. Sorry. We'll get over it. Let me stop bringing it up. Let's just move on. Work with what we got.
So these are parkman numbers I'm calling now. These are in the Guam. Ivy Educational Services. Before that a caller. Hello caller you're on the air.
Hey Logan. What's up? What's up man I missed you so much.
I mean it's alright. We're here. I'm here. Everything's great. Don't worry.
You have people on YouTube that are sending money through super chat.
Can you see them?
Yeah, I can.
By the end of the show, I usually give a shout out to all of them.
Oh, okay.
So, is he missing these people?
I sent you one episode when I was on, and I don't think I waited until the end of the show.
I usually try right before break, I do a check, and at the end of the show, I do a check,
and I'll give out the message that you leave.
All right.
Oh, okay, one of the cameras is working now
All right, so shout out to Xander fat Xander fat hooking up a nice donation, thank you
Brian also the super chat says give horsey cat a pin on the head for me
Well, you won't be able to see it unfortunately because the fucking waters bring it here. I can bring it in now
Nice pet. There's there's the horsey cat getting nice on the shitty camera
Trump Tard with a super chat thank you Xander Fett with another donation thank you
Cebollum donated said hey silly ass call restaurants and order spicy hot lamby nipple
chops and minty pickled sour sauce okay you got it you paid I will play Amber Corwin with a couple
of super chats also thank you big Amber yeah thank you all my supporters all my patrons all my
Goat
Cracker
Doraemon
Eric Caller are you happy?
Shit, Caller I said I got you back now.
You missed nothing.
Alright.
We gotta call and ask for some lamby nippy chops.
Nippy chop something something.
Let me find a restaurant.
That's gonna have to be like a Chinese restaurant.
Is that Chinese?
Lamby nipple chops?
What do you think that is?
Yeah.
I thought it was Greek a little bit.
Lamb chops?
Yeah, I guess so.
But.
Is it minty pickled sour sauce?
I think Korean
Is all that stuff with YouTube good now?
Didn't you have a lot of your stuff deleted from YouTube?
Yeah, and then I got suspended for six months on there
I couldn't broadcast live or anything
Yeah, I don't know why it happened
But you could still broadcast on Mixler and stuff like that, huh?
Oh yeah, it was just YouTube
And then I just was like, fuck it, I'm gonna do it on
I was just on Facebook Live
Fuckhhh
It ticked me off because it's a good revenue stream for me with YouTube
I actually get quite a bit of I know help through there
So it kind of put me back and I can see how people get upset when they get demonetize on YouTube
Some people really depend on that like creators and stuff, you know influencers as they say
What are you helpless like when I happened? Well, yeah, basically it was like it was it was like here you can appeal
You can only appeal once we won't tell you why it happened
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It's scary for people that have like their whole livelihood like they're paying for their house their cars their kids
And it's literally you can appeal one time you can do this and it's like you're literally left in limbo
It really is that's and then they want that crazy
Persian chick that shot up people at the youtube headquarters
She went crazy because of it not saying that she should have done what she did, but still yeah
Just saying dude. I mean they need to communicate better like you need to be able to talk to a real person
Well, then they came out and it might have been because of that shooting thing
They came out they came out and said we're gonna be more transparent about when people and then we got new guidelines
We'll give you a warning first and those rules
I believe they started kicking in this month or or they're going to soon their new rules about
being more
Informative about what should happen more fair a lot of people come out. Is this Korean restaurant?
I'd like to make an order
Yes
One kimchi fried rice
Okay, one spicy hot lamby nipple chops and minty pickled sour sauce
One spicy hot lamby nipple chops and minty pickled sour sauce
Can you not fucking hear me?
I can't hear you
Fuck man
Try to make a fucking order
Yeah
Okay, one spicy hot lamby nipple chops and minty pickled sour sauce
I think you got the wrong number
This is cool, that's what I'm looking for
No!
Kimchi fried rice
You like kimchi fried rice and then?
Spicy hot lamby nipple chops and minty pickled sours
We don't have that one
Are you a fucking idiot sir?
Hello?
Yes
Why are you being ignorant?
No, what are you talking about? You said you like kimchi fried rice, right?
Yeah
What's your wife's name? What's your wife's name?
Can I get Shishu Shishu
Excuse me?
Shishu
Yeah, what about it?
Shishu Shishu
Happy people?
Wait, hold on, hold on
Thank you, he was about to tell us his wife's name
I love it
Do you love your wife? What what the fuck you talking about?
Does your wife you love your wife? Does your wife have?
Does your wife have pubic hair in a private parts?
Alright, thank you to Alex for your donation and Ryan
Ryan Jardino Big Ryan with a very generous super chat. Thank you very much, sir.
You could have made a request or a message. Shout out. Would have done it.
Oh, Ryan with a 50 bomb.
Damn, Ryan.
Oh, Ryan.
Ryan went to Coinstar today. Wow.
Yup, and yup.
Ryan's getting some labia tonight.
Fuck yeah.
Hell yeah, Ryan.
Labia juice.
Alright, more careers.
I feel like the last guy got really nervous when we asked about his wife like she had
We need our fucking labia sauce with sours, nippling, whatever the fuck that was
I'm starving
I don't know what the fucking joke was
I'll keep them on the line while I dial them up
Maybe we can get a twofer
Korean food?
Yes
Alright, can I get an order please? One kimchi fried rice
Okay, and then?
Spicey Hot Lamby Nipple Chops and Minty Pickled Sour Sauce
Spicy Hot Lamby Nipple Chops and Minty Pickled Sour Sauce
We don't have a lamb. You got the wrong place.
Shut up. You have kimchi?
We have a kimchi, but not a lamb.
Hey, when I eat kimchi...
What's your wife's name?
You know what kimchi smells like?
It does. It smells like shit.
What's your wife's name?
Hey, what is your wife's name, huh?
What? My wife's name?
Now, why are you getting scared?
Your wife told us to call you. She's worried.
She thinks you're out with another man.
Does she have hair in her private pussy area?
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Does she what we'll get your number call the police. Okay, you don't call shit. Oh, no, no, no, no, please. Please. Please
No, no, no, you call shit motherfucker. You shit
Thanks. Oh, don't call me. Oh you you shut up. Thanks. Who told us to call you you sit down when you pee
Oh, what are you talking about? Huh? You when you pee you sit down. Oh
You sit on the toilet you pee keep keeping me in
I want to talk to me come down here. No, we want to talk to your wife. Not you
No you calmed down you calmed down
We want to talk to waifu
Waifu waifu waifu
One more time I'll call the police ok
Fuck you
No you first
Fuck you mother fucker
Fuck you
I don't know which one that was I don't know where he came from
I don't know if I called the previous place again
I thought it was a different place
Dude they all get so scared when you ask about their wives
Like dude Korean men are doing something shady
Oh, I'm sure they are look at them. Yeah, look at them. They don't even fucking they're importing panda bears illegally
Hello, this is where's the panda Korean restaurant? Yes. Okay. Do you have panda bear?
Panda bear do you have panda bear? Just no man. That's my man. Stupid
What the fuck? Hello. Do you have panda bear? Oh
The animal
What does the man pen the bear, you know, it's a bear from from Asia
No
White panda cute panda bear, you know TV on your TV. No. No, we don't have a panda bear here
Do you have kimchi fried rice? Yeah. Yeah, how long how long for me to take a shit after you the kimchi fried rice?
Sorry, how long for me to take a shit?
Eat to poop, eat to poop
What the fuck are you talking about here?
How long does it take to take a shit after I eat the green rice?
What the fuck?
What the fuck are you talking about?
What the fuck are you talking shit about?
What the fuck are you talking shit about?
Get fucked!
Oh man, everyone crashed, everyone's gone
Yeah, how long does it take to take a shit after I eat the food?
Oh, how many people?
Just one person
After I eat the food, how long until I have to shit in the toilet?
That's a better meaning. I don't know.
Do you know what is shit?
Oh, no.
This is all you can eat. You can eat it.
What?
What do you mean?
You know you go to the bathroom after you eat the food?
Okay, one moment, please.
You can join the show if you'd like for a prank or three by dialing 405-396-6884.
Available anywhere within the sound of my voice.
Hello caller, thanks for calling. Yay!
I'm calling about the TV.
Oh no, the hate crime.
What? No, the TV.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Closed Captioning by The Closed Captioning Project
Did he save that to the his Facebook? Can we put can I play that later? I wonder I want to get I don't know
Was it better when he showed his dick to everybody on?
Brands call just dropped. I don't know where David King did it. I didn't hang up on you Brad
I don't know what happened man. Let's call Burger King cuz I had something to happen man. All right
This is happen in high school
I've always if I'm gonna be in a car or if I'm driving and I'm gonna get bird can't drive through
Listen, ever since I was in high school, since the 90s, if I'm going to be in a car, you know, driving and I get a whopper through the drive-thru, I've never had a problem ever with you guys cutting the sandwich in half.
And I asked for it at the drive-thru today and they told me that they were not allowed to do that. Why?
When is that? Like earlier?
nthp
I'm just being told that we're not allowed to do that and i said why not
why you can't cut in half you guys always cut in half for me so that it
doesn't yeah yeah the car you know stupid oh when did you go drive through
like earlier like uh yeah it was about one time sir it was a kanaka that said it
Huh?
Canaka?
Yeah
But this is like a...
Uh...
Wasn't it in this location?
Or what?
Vuhvuhvuhvuh
Drop in what?
The other one
The Tanya
Are you sure?
Are you talking about this store?
Yeah, it's the fuckin' you
How did you get here?
Yes yes yes
Okay yeah and they said no you can't have it cut in half why?
Why would Berkey not have any knives?
Why would you not be allowed to use a knife?
I don't understand
No we do cut it because I never heard like did you come here like around uh one o'clock
like that?
Yeah
About what time did you come here?
About one o'clock like that yeah
Ah I wasn't here at that time how come?
I don't know and I had my pants were on I didn't take my pants off you know
Well what would you
Well, if I took my pants off of my car, I'd understand why they said they can't help me, you know.
Could you just talk about what happened to your order again?
I said, let me get a Bacon King, okay? The Bacon King meal.
And then they told you that they cannot cut your sandwich in half.
And I said I wanted a Surge Zero with no ice, and they said, sure, no problem.
And I said, can you cut it in half? And she said, yes, of course we can.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I can give you plastic knives I can give you a plastic knife like no no I'm not gonna sit here in
my car and do that myself it's gonna make a bigger mess and I just ate it like that but I
honestly didn't understand why would they say you're not unless you like maybe something where
like if you're under 18 you can't use knives or something that's the only thing I could figure
but then again I'm pretty sure someone there would have been able to do it anyway someone there has
You have to use a knife. You have to be able to use a knife to cut lettuce and tomato and shit, right?
Why would they say something like that? I was so upset.
But I got my receipt, and I'm going to call the line for the survey, and it gave a very bad review.
I'm going to complain about it, and I get a free Whopper for that. I can't wait.
No, it didn't ask them to cut the crust off. How do you cut the crust off of a Whopper?
Think about what you're saying for a second. The whole thing has crust.
I'm the one asking why did they say this to me that they can't cut a fucking sandwich in half a Burger King why what's going on with this world what is this man fucking Millennials I just don't understand anyway it's break time we're gonna come back at night about another hour show hope you're all enjoying so far again apologies to the youtubers you can't see the music
Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Madhouse Studios
Going to a homosexual wedding tomorrow?
Yeah
Alright, be right back in a little bit, thank you
Listening to Madhouse
On the largest
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Prank Call Nation
Be sure to visit online at madhouselive.com
Madhouse Radio will be back right after this
I'm back
You know, seriously, the Dave King thing
I'm not saying the TV thing that I say to mess with them it means television not the transvestite he's just grasping at straws although he does look like a transvestite kind of but that's not what I mean it's because he's all conspiracy theory this and that and you know don't let the government control you and shit and then I just know one day I was watching his feed he's like I just got a new TV he was super excited about the TV
Call Nation Madhouse Live
sell it to get money to get back to Canada
No?
That's all I'm getting at it has nothing homophobic
nothing anti trans
about it at all
it's just the stupid sh1t that I said
ask any of the the PCM people
the hosts
I said the weirdest sh1t in the middle of the day
if you're in a hijinx chat
hijinx.fun4slashpranks
is that what it is?
if you're in the hijinx discord chat
you will see during the day
I'll just post a random fucking quote that comes from either an audio book that I'm listening to or a podcast or
Something and I'll say something really random and weird. That's where I came from. That's all it was
It was me and Lysol McFly just saying the TV the TV all the time to him
I was just pointing out the hypocrisy of the guy talks about government controlling people and all this stuff
And then he's got it's nice TV. You know, that's it
I have always liked Dave King and this honestly the only reason I said fuck you shut up asshole on your Facebook live video comment today was because when I opened my fucking mobile app to go watch you Facebook auto starts auto playing stuff really loud on my cell phone it starts playing it and it's you yelling the F word at the top of your lungs because you're having weird tantrums rest in peace Bushwick Bill
BUSHWICK BILL
Raga Muffins
Mr. Sexy Pants
Rest in Peace David King's TV
A member of the iconic Houston-based rap trio The Ghetto Boys, who was born in Kingston, Jamaica with dwarfism, died June 9, 2019 at the age of 52 at 3 feet 8 inches tall after a long-time battle with pancreatic cancer.
Richard Stephen Shaw, or Bushwick Bill, was featured on The Ghetto Boys' hit songs Mind Playing Tricks on Me and Damn It Feels Good to Be a Gangsta.
He also released multiple solo albums.
Call Nation Madhouse Live
I was really hungry. I just took this stuff off the shelf. I'm making a really mean sandwich back here tuna sandwich
I grabbed oh a package of tuna, you know, and okay some mayonnaise and some bread
Do you have the pre-cut onions here if we have pre-cut onions in the store?
Yeah, because I want to make a really good sandwich. I'm gonna eat it here in the bathroom
You're gonna eat it in the bathroom. Yeah
Huh?
I'm obese and I need to eat a lot of food. We do not have pre-cut onion, sir
Okay, I could just go to the produce aisle and grab one. But how do I cut it up?
Do you have a knife I can use in the meat department maybe?
Please I'm hold on please please. I'm so hungry
Hi, Christina, is this the 2nd Avenue location in Honolulu? Yes, okay
Okay, I'm calling from the corporate office with Southland corporate office in Dallas, Texas
You wanna try to call them in office, Honolulu, Hawaii 7-eleven. No, no, I need to speak to someone at this store
Okay, so do you understand? Okay. Okay. Did you get the instructions about the recall of the diet coke?
Not that I know
Okay. Do you have any two liters of diet coke two liters diet coke? Yeah, let me check
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank Call Nation Madhouse Live
7-eleven is they don't uh they don't give me the update for this one they don't give you yeah if
if we have a recall for the for that product and then the mom in office they have to uh you know
they get the email it to us yeah we usually send it in the computer system but um you don't know
about that and we had a we we had a report that they were being sold out of here still through
the satellite it shows that they've been rung up so we for we want to make sure the reason it could
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Call Nation Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Madhouse Live
Southland
Texas Southland
and then uh
ok hold on
and we are on hold everyone
do not be worried about the silence
trying to get our Diet Coke shower on here
you know
celebrate Toronto Raptors winning NBA Finals
which I'm all for
because you know they beat the Magic in round 1
and I'm cool with that
at least my team the Magic lost to the
fucking champions
eventual champions
and I know that game 1
Magic Vs. Raptors
Feed the people
like those that do cuz really that the donations today on YouTube and 1 that I've gotten the donations are gonna probably go towards a new camera because I'm a bonus one out with the fuckin water that was original
Sonia
corporate office hi hi did you not receive the email about diet coke two
liters do you have any in the store right now okay okay did you not do the
test for the diet coke two liter to check to see if it has the uranium
shavings in it I need you to do a test of the diet coke two liter I'll tell you
What to do is to see if we need to not to pull it off the shelf what no none of the computer you
need to get a two liter of diet coke and a package of Mentos the mint the mint flavored Mentos like
the blue white one a two liter diet coke yeah Mentos Mentos mint flavored Mentos you know it's
Matt Baz Milkman
Matt Baz Milkman
where are you gonna do it on the counter or my name is Akula Gonzalez we
need to check if it changes colors if it turns gray we need to not sell them
because it's it's it's contaminated but if it doesn't change color then it's
okay you have to it's important it's for compliance I'm in
I'm in Texas. I'm in Texas. I'm in the corporate office in Texas.
Okay, maybe you're just going to like sell whatever.
I need you to do this now, please.
This is important. It could make our customers sick.
Okay, can you call back because I have to meet the manager first. No.
No, you need to do it now.
No, I cannot do that.
God damn it.
I have to help the customer because I have a long line right now.
You're going to get in big trouble if you don't do it.
Okay.
Bye.
Damn it. I thought we had her.
I thought we had her.
Hello, I'm calling from the corporate office. My name is Akula Gonzales. I'm here with Southland Corporation
We received a report from the computer system that you're still selling Diet Coke 2 liters
Yes, I have I'm calling from the corporate office. I understand that you're selling Diet Coke 2 liters here
Really?
To the Diet Coke shade the shavings in the Diet Coke. Are you still selling Diet Coke off the shelf?
Did you perform the field test yet to check to see whether or not it's safe to sell?
You're the Hawaii store. Yeah, you're the Hawaii store on kawaii kai
I don't have record of that. I don't have the store number spreadsheet here in front of someone already checked it out from the
SharePoint site I can't get to
The Brad Carter thing no, that's not what this is
I'm calling from the corporate office.
We need to do a field test of the Diet Coke 2 liter.
Yeah, you do, stupid.
No, you stupid.
Monk, you burnt pineapple kanaka.
Get out of here.
Damn, I'm wasting my time.
See, I used to be able to get the store numbers.
I used to always have them ready when I called.
But their website doesn't give you the store number.
Probably because of this.
If I could get just one geyser going.
Just one geyser.
Hello, 7-Eleven, Pali, how can I help you?
Hello, is this the Kailua location?
Yes, near Kailua High School.
Kailua Road, okay, good.
I'm calling from the corporate office, Southland Corporation.
Right.
What's, do you, have you done the field test for the Diet Coke yet?
Okay, I don't know anything of that,
and because our manager is not in right now.
Uh-huh.
Matt Baz Milkman Thomas Trank Prank
and
how did that keep if you can grab a diet coke to leader
anyone and a pack of mentos
candies
you know what sir can i call you back i need to get permission from my bond
i don't have an incoming line but this is really quick and once we take care
of this all the other u
com through their caster
k
this is for compliance
and
i have a gentleman on the school
He's calling from the corporate office. He wants me to check the diet
Pepsi in our store because there's like a recall
Diet coke diet coke. I'm sorry
Yeah, he wants me to get a pack of Mentos and the and the bottle of diet coke and test it to see if it's
Contaminated. Oh, no, no
No
Okay. Okay. Okay. Thank you. Okay. Thank you. Yeah
Tell her I said asshole. Tell her I said she's asshole.
Labia. Labia. Labia. Damn it. It ain't gonna happen. The monkeys in Hawaii have gotten caught
on. This is a prank. Oh no. This is a prank. Maybe there's been a memo sent out. I haven't
had one of these work out in quite some time since the Italian guy in the UK did it for
Prank Call Nation
The Station Where You'll Listen Into Me Now
King
Thank you everybody for joining on this adventure.
I hope you had a good time.
Thank you Parkman for sending in numbers.
I need to call.
Y'all have a good weekend.
Enjoy your Saturday.
Have a good Father's Day if you're a father or have a father.
Get some steak on Sunday.
Father's Day.

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